Bev's Thoughts

No Clue

2011-02-03T18:27:00.000-08:00

I've never been a very faithful blogger but last April, I decided to take a very, very long sabbatical. I did not know if I would ever return. My whole life had been ripped and broken - I have continued to journal, but very privately. My own thoughts don't make sense to me a lot of the time. I absolutely have lost my courage to write them for others to view. I can verbalize them face-to-face because then I can tell from my audience's eyes if I am going places too painful for them to bear. I have learned in the last year to 'give myself permission' to go at my own pace and do what I need to do at that moment to quiet my soul.
Well, tonight, I want to write so... I give myself permission to return to my blog. Be easy with me.

We have had 3 snow days in a row. Before last February 22, I would have jokingly said that the Lord gave these three days to me so I could sit in stillness and enjoy His presence. Now I'm not so sure God is as concerned about what conditions extrinsically quiet my heart but He has used these days as a gift for my reflection.

Here we are - February 3, 2011. This date last year, it was a Wednesday, my life was so rich, so sweet, so delightful. I wore a necklace daily that says, 'Blessed'. I didn't wear it that day and haven't worn it since. I will again, but not right now.

On February 3, I had no clue - no clue what was coming. Jenny was sick, so sick. We texted some that day. I tried to call but she texted back to say that talking was too painful. I offered, fairly forcefully, to come get her and take her to the doctor again. She refused because it had only been less than 48 hours since she had been to doctor and was diagnosed with the flu. No clue. I went through a normal day at my office - seeing clients. Miriam Cowles, a wonderful counselor from Carrollton, came over to work with me - it was her first day and she has been coming one day a week for this entire year. (God's timing - I'm positively certain!) No clue. I taught our women's class that night, one of the Names of God - I don't even remember which one. It doesn't matter. No clue. I texted Jenny when I got home from church to see how she was. No response, not that unusual. No clue. Before going to sleep, I checked my phone to make sure it wasn't on silent in case Jenny needed me in the night. I prayed and then slept. No clue.

February 3, 2010, was the last 'normal' day of my life. While this has all shocked us, and totally devastated us, it has not shocked or devastated Him. He saw it coming all along. He knew when He knit me together in my mother's womb that I would bury my first-born. (That doesn't roll off my fingers any easier than it rolls off my tongue. Those words still put me on the floor.) How have I survived the last year? Why am I still breathing?

God has called our family to do hard so we do hard. We continue to beg Him for His Light to shine on our path - it still seems so dark.

But His presence is absolutely thick over us!

Now I wear a necklace with my precious daughter's face. I cannot wait until the day I get to kiss her cheek, inhale her aroma and touch her hands, as she welcomes me into the doors of heaven and introduces me to Jesus.

Tomorrow is coming...

Two Months Ago Today

2010-04-22T14:30:00.000-07:00

Who would have thought we would still be breathing without our Jenny? I woke up at 4:30 this morning going over all the events of February 22 - one more time. I have spent the day just trying to finish thank you notes - please know how grateful we have been! The Lord has been pouring His love on us through His people. There have been so many sweet moments. Today, we have received precious messages and even a gorgeous spring bouquet from a family in Houston. Spring is normally my favorite season - I love the newness! This arrangement fills me with hope that I will enjoy vibrant colors again.

I am trying to share some on Wednesday nights. I know it is weird but I feel calmer telling my girlfriends that I am sharing - definitely not teaching. I feel too whipped out to have anything to teach - but I feel a calling on my soul to share. I want to talk about Jenny. I want to talk about God. I want to calm the fear I see in people's eyes that seems to come just from my presence these days. I know they love me and hurt so much to see me wearing such heavy pain. I have to wear it though. It is where I am. I believe - oh, how I believe, that authenticity breeds authenticity. I crave realness! so...

I met with my good friend and colleague, Vicki Straughan, a grief therapist, on Tuesday for about 6 hours. We met at Esperanza's because Joe T's was closed at 2:30. Then about 7, we went across the street to Joe's to finish our 'session'. Rick joined us for the enchiladas. I loved our time together. I love that she let me sort out every detail. I love that she wanted to know. I love that she loves me. Vicki says we are handling everything very well. So this is what it feels like to be doing the grief-walk well?

I have never enjoyed reading Job - who does? But lately I have been going through this book from Eugene Peterson's work, The Message. I want to close with a verse from the end of Job 3:

"The worst of my fears has come true,
what I've dreaded most has happened.
My repose is shattered, my peace destroyed.
No rest for me, ever - death has invaded life."

Yes, death has invaded life but so has the Holy Spirit. He is pouring His peace on me and giving me rest - even as I continue to groan. (For those of you who know I have been unable to do anything but groan in my conversation with the Lord, the last few days - I have been able to use a few words.)

Running with Jenny

2010-04-08T19:00:00.000-07:00

The precious Lord has used so many precious friends to bless us and to remind us of His love even in this horrific darkness. Some of these friends have joined us in making Malaya's 10th birthday as special as possible. We will be partying all weekend! We are really missing Jenny as we celebrate Malaya's birth. The family is gathered and one face is definitely missing. Oh how we are missing her laugh and her total delight in her nephews and niece.

Some of Jenny's friends have organized a run/walk to raise money to help David with medical bills. Please go to www.runningwithjenny.com for details. KidStand will perform and their be lots of celebrating going on. Please come! There is also a link on this website for awesome jewelry that has been designed in honor of Jenny.

Thank you, sweet friends!

Malaya's Writing

2010-03-31T15:56:00.000-07:00

Several times a week, I have been eating lunch with Malaya. Such a special time for us! I love seeing her face light up when she is either coming down the stairs with her class (or rounding the corner when she asks to ride the elevator) and she sees me. She acts surprised even though she has turned in her menu choice the night before - just plain precious!
Last week, her teacher handed me a paper with a poem that Malaya - 9 years old - wrote. The prompt given was 'If...'; all the other words were from Malaya's precious little heart. Last night my grand-daughter gave me permission to post her poem on my blog.
This Sunday, as we celebrate the resurrection of our Lord Jesus, I will be thinking also of the resurrection of our precious Jenny. I can't wait to share her daughter's poem with her!

If Imagination Were Real in Different Ways
By Malaya Bazaillion
If angels and spirits could talk . . .
If Mom were here . . .
If clouds were windows and the sun was the entrance to heaven . . .
If no one could leave this earth . . .
If hearts weren't broken . . .
If there were no color . . .
If there were no sin in the world today . . .
If death were defeated . . .
If heaven was earth . . .
If my heart was still full of pride and not broken . . .
If people could keep promises . . .

Yes, she is 9 but she sure expresses the heart of this 53 year old!

Random Thoughts

2010-03-24T14:16:00.000-07:00

The Disney cruise was such a welcome distraction from the heaviness of the last few weeks. I loved our long dinner talks and our excursions! I love the beach - the sand, the sound, the sun.
I am so totally thankful for precious sweet friends who continue to allow the Lord to use them to bless us.

As I reflect over the past several weeks, I recognize that I have felt extremely raw and desperate but never alone. God's presence has been very real and profound. Friends who love Him are consistent reminders.

Unbelievable sadness overwhelmed me when the funeral flowers died and the plants had to be watered. Signs that this is real life for us now.

I have never been more thankful for friends who pray. I cherish the daily reminders I get from people telling me they are lifting our family to the Lord. I keep my Bible by the computer to look up the verses you are sending to me. Some are already written on my heart, sweet reminders; some are new to my heart, sweet teachings.

"On Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers." 2 Corinthians 1: 10-11

I love the Lord - I will never serve another.

Walking a Dark Road

2010-03-11T20:42:00.000-08:00

Five weeks ago today, it felt like Satan took a baseball bat and knocked my knees out from under me, breaking both. For the next 18 days, I was able to occasionally lift my head only to have him kick hard enough to send me smashing my face into the ground. Then, on February 22, the darkness settled over me and I will never be the same. So many questions are swirling in my gut. Such a feeling of desperation – waking up in the middle of night fighting to breathe, like I am trying to help my precious daughter. Oh how my heart breaks!
Oh I hear the cliques about how happy she is in heaven but I cannot wrap my head around her being happy knowing David and Malaya are without her physical presence. I am writing this strictly to deal with my own journey of grief. I am not seeking advice. I have become quite reclusive except for my family.

There are 2 verses that I am soaking write now:

Isaiah 45: 3 – “I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.”
This verse does not say that God gives the darkness but the treasures that can be found in it. How I never wanted to enter into this 'secret place' - every parent's nightmare.
While sadness is heavy, weighty, I do not feel alone. I know He is covering me, even though, may be in spite of, His silence. Oh I don’t like His silence!

Romans 15: 13 (Jenny’s favorite verse) - “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

I trust in You, Precious Lord, even though I have no clue what You are doing!

El Roi

2009-10-21T16:19:00.000-07:00

From Elohim, we learn the reason for our existence and the motivation for obedience. From El Elyon, we learn to abandon our analytical nature and fall on our faces in worship.
Oh, but from El Roi, we learn the protection of being seen/known.

The story God chooses to reveal Himself as El Roi is one of the most difficult stories in the Word. It is a confusing story. It is a name revealed to woman - a woman in intense pain, embarrassment, suffering abuse and abandonment.

Reminder: Isaiah 45: 3 "I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places so that you may KNOW that I am the God of Israel who summons you by name."

In Genesis 12, God promises Abram and Sarai a child. They wait ten years. Sarai gets frustrated in the waiting and decides God must have called her to help Him out. She tells Abram to take Hagar, her Egyptian servant, and sleep with her. Sarai's plan appears to be that Hagar would be the first surrogate mother - and we have no reason to believe that Hagar was ever asked to apply for that role.
Verse 4 tells us that when Hagar's eyes fell to the positive pregnancy test, hatred arose in her heart for Sarai. Sarai got the nod from Abram to do 'whatever she thought best' to Hagar.
The NIV said Sarai 'mistreated' Hagar - enough so that she ran out of town.

Along the way, by the spring in the desert, she met an angel of the Lord who began to ask her questions - questions he already knew the answers to: "where have you come from, and where are you going?"
At that place is where Hagar called the Lord - El Roi, the God Who sees me.

(Doesn't that remind you of another woman by a well?)

Implications:
*We can know that He "gets us". He knows more about what has happened to us than we have a clue. He knows more about what we have done than we have a clue.
*We know that He can fill the crevices of our heart with Himself.
*We can tattle to Him about our pain and know He sees it all!

El Elyon

2009-10-13T07:42:00.000-07:00

God as our Elohim, our Strong Creator, the Source of everything! His instructions for life matter!

I received an electric frying pan as a wedding gift - oh my, 33 years ago. If you were around in the 70's, you remember that harvest gold color every kitchen boasted. That skillet has long been gone - but only after frying up approximately 1,969,234 chicken strips. My family loves chicken strips! After a few years of once-a-week chicken-frying, that skillet had this film on the outside I could not scrub off - no matter how much elbow grease I invested. I desperately wanted to soak that baby in Comet (remember that stuff?) - but there were 3 words on the bottom that prohibited me from that move - boy, did that take self-control. The words: Do Not Immerse were embossed on the underside of my favorite appliance. What?!?! It would look so much better - at least, I know it would make me feel so much better. I had a choice to make. I could soak it, feel a wonderful sense of accomplishment, and never use it to fry those slim strips again. Or I could follow the instructions and continue to use it to delight my family; I could continue to use to do what it was made to do.

That's how it is with God! His instructions for us empower us to do what we were made to do. His instructions for the way to do life free us to worship Him! El Elyon, the Most High God -- the King of kings, the Lord of Lords. The most superlative! He reveals Himself as the Owner, the Possessor of heaven and earth.

El Elyon is the name Satan lusts after.

El Elyon will do whatever it takes in the lives of His creation to humble us and bend our knee to His throne. (read Daniel 4: 34-37)

It is totally impossible to comprehend El Elyon and not worship Him!
I am at a season of life when my best times of worship are when I am totally alone because I have to focus on not distracting other people through my freedom and celebration. It hit me in the 90's while watching my sons play football. I could act like a total maniac because a ball crossed a line in the grass but not on Sundays because my Savior died while hanging on wood - that the tomb they buried Him in is empty! What??? Desire to celebrate - oh my! We have to celebrate!

Wednesday night in class we brainstormed some of the worship language used in the Word: dancing, lifting hands, clapping, bowing, standing, falling on your face, shouting.

I know our hearts can fully worship in total silence, but I sure desire to celebrate everyday in reckless abandonment, to proclaim that I serve El Elyon, the Most High!

May the stones never cry out! (Luke 19: 37-40)
May we bring to Him a "sacrifice of praise"! (Hebrews 13:15)

Someday, when I see Him face to face and know Him as I am known, I will worship in community with other 'crazy mamas'! Can't wait!

Elohim

2009-10-05T09:55:00.000-07:00

I love our Wednesday night community of women - we gather to share in relationship with one another, to lift each other in prayer, and to open God's Word and find some passages to marinate through our souls. I have spent three weeks introducing the study I began in 1994 to "find out what pleases the Lord". I desperately want to know Him. I want to "seek Him with all my heart." God set out through the beginning of time to invite us into His heart by introducing Himself.

Genesis 1:1 -- "In the beginning God..." Elohim, the Strong Creator, the source of everything!
In creation, when God spoke, things happened! The key words in the creation story are: God spoke, 'Let...' and 'it was good.'
In Genesis 1, Elohim is used 32 times in reference to the King of my life. Elohim is a plural noun used with a singular verb - oh so interesting!

In Genesis 1: 26 -- "Then God said, Let us make man in our image..."
What are the implications when He says He made us in His image?

A few weeks ago, I had the blessing of going to Memphis where my son and his precious family live. Memphis is one of my favorite places on earth because it is home to Truitt and Noah. Noah is our brand new addition! He is our first grandchild that is a twinkie to one of our own. He looks exactly like Josh, his daddy. Looking into his eyes one night as I was babysitting and feeding him a bottle took me back in time and filled my heart with sweet remembrances. I felt this swell of love for him - he looked like 'us'. Don't you know that is how God feels when He sees us reflect His family well - when we reveal His heart to the hurting, when we love another well. I wonder if He gets that fatherly smile on His precious face and brags to the Son and Spirit: "Look what we made in our image!"

We look most like Him when we have the heart to do what He made us to be:

*He wired us for community. God was the originator of the 'team' concept.

*He made us to react quickly when stressed, but He never planned on us living in stress.
Serotonin (the 'peace' hormone) and cortisol (the stress hormone) rival for the same receptors in the brain. When both are elevated, cortisol wins every time because your body responds quickly to protect your life. Today, way too many of us are oozing cortisol - not a healthy way to do life, not the way we are made!

*Elohim wired us for monogamy - one woman, one man forever! I LOVE my job! Current research, not Christian research, validates that this principle leads to much better health in every arena of life!

*God made you to love well! Oxytocin, the 'cuddle' hormone, is what encourages healthy attachment with others. While, oxytocin floods our systems at childbirth, breastfeeding, orgasms, it is also surging through sweet encounters with your partners, children, and friends.

*Our Strong Creator made us to worship Him!

Psalm 46: 10 "Be still and know that I am God (the Strong Creator)."

Isaiah 43: 7 tells us why we were created: "everyone who is called by My name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made."

We were created to bring our Elohim glory - to make Him look really, really good! We were created to spotlight Him well!

Quotes from Class #3

2009-09-16T19:27:00.000-07:00

Isn't it just the sweetest thing ever that God gives us a whole book filled with His own story told through the lives of broken people so we can know Him and learn to trust Him!?!?

We will glorify Him and enjoy Him in direct proportion to how much we know Him.

We are not going to trust someone we don't know.
We are not going to sell-out to someone we don't know.
We are not going to obey someone we don't know.

The more estranged our relationship with God, the greater our emotional expectations of people. The greater our emotional expectations of people, the more difficult life is; the greater emotional pain we live in, the more difficult we are to live with. (by Rod Pruitt)

May we enter into relationship - a deep and delightful relationship - with the God Who calls our name!

A Few Thoughts from Class Tonight

2009-09-09T20:21:00.000-07:00

A.W. Tozer said that “the most important thing about us is what we believe about God.” Amen and amen!

Two scriptures that have proven to be great meditation points for me are Jeremiah 29: 12-13 and Isaiah 30: 15-16, 18, 20-21.

Jeremiah 29 reads:
“Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity.”

What phrases stand out to you? Where draws the eye of your heart in for a second glance?

“I will listen to you.”
“You will seek me”
“All your heart”
“I will be found”
“Back from captivity”

Don’t you desperately want to dance in freedom…
Through knowing that He hears you?
Through knowing that He passionately wants you to find Him?
Through seeking Him with every inch of your heart?
Through chains being released?

What do we need to pray for the Lord to prune away from us so that we seek Him with all of our energy and strength, focus and purpose?
It doesn’t have to be sin that needs to be stripped. It can be the things that the Lord gave us for good that has become too prominent, too important in our hearts.

Isaiah 30 reads:
“In repentance and rest is your salvation,
in quietness and trust is your strength,
but you would have none of it.
You said, “No, we will flee on horses. Therefore you will flee!
You said, “We will ride off on swift horses.” Therefore your pursuers will be swift!...

Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion.
For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him!...

Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.”

Let some of those phrases soak in your meditation pool for a bit!

What are the “horses” of today? Could it be they represent anything that gives us perceived power?

Falling in love is only sweet and enjoyed – delightful – when relationship is maintained!

Tozer: The most important thing about us is what we believe about God.

God wants us to know Him and He reveals Himself through giving His people different glimpses into what they could call Him – His names.

Draw us in, precious Lord, to Your heart! May we know You and love You more through the study of Your living breathing Word!

Seeking Him with All My Heart

2009-09-05T14:57:00.000-07:00

Sometime during the first session of marriage counseling, I like to ask the couple to share in telling me how they met, then how they fell in love – that first ‘ahah’ moment when you just know there is something jsut really special about another.

I love this question but most of all I love how it transforms faces and hearts. I don’t get to work with marriages when things are going well but more likely when stress and tension are being experienced by one or both people.
Giving voice to our histories helps us relive them. To recall the sweetness of our history empowers us to claim it in our present.

Another question I love asking: Exactly how did you meet the Lord; how did you fall head over heals in love with Him? Oh to relish in the sweetness of those memories! To claim them in my present!

In my own life, I cannot remember a day that I have not known the Him. My parents taught me all about Him!
But, oh how I remember the season I fell in love with Him!

It was 1994-1995 – my precious friend, Sharmon Ramsey, had just died from a massive brain aneurysm. I knew there had to be more to life – more to life with Jesus – than I had been experiencing. I began to cry out to the Lord to teach me, to show me, how to know Him more, how to love Him more, how to want Him more.

That is when I found the words in Jeremiah 29: 12-14:

“Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.”

Those words continue to be my heartcry: Teach me, Father, what it means to seek You with all my heart. I want to continue to find more and more of You. Thank You, Precious Lord, for releasing me from the enemy’s captivity. May I dance in the freedom of Your love and grace and mercy as long as my feet walk on dirt!

Weekly, on Wednesday nights, I will be sharing thoughts from the personal journey that I went through in 1994-1995 – the study that led me to fall totally and delightfully in love with the Love of my life! It is a study of the ‘names’ of God.

If I handed you a piece of paper today and ask you to write out how you met Him, how you fell in love, some of you could fill the page with details. Some would have blank pages. Oh, sweet friends, don’t let your page set blank. Let’s fall deeply, head-over-hills in love with the Creator of our souls! If your page is full, I am praying right now that you will recognize ways to share your story in the days to come!

To His Name be ALL praise and glory!

First Day of My "Days of Sacrifice"

2009-02-25T19:41:00.000-08:00

Ok, Ok - I know I haven't written in forever. No one is probably reading this site anymore but today I am writing down a few thoughts to help me think! In 2003, I practiced Lent for the very first time and I will never not do it again (is that enough negatives for you?). I LOVE Easter! I love that the tomb is empty! I love preparing for the celebration of it. I like sacrificing something for this season that will draw my mind into His presence a bit more than normal. This year, I am focusing not only the gospel story, but I am reading Philippians 2: 5-11 many times a day. I can't quote it - I am sad about that. I want to write those words on my heart. I am begging the Lord to remover my prideful off-shoots. I am begging Him to prune me softer than I pruned my rosebushes last week but also more thoroughly. Is it possible for a pruning to be soft and thorough? Ok - I chose thorough - I want to choose thorough - I pray I will want to choose thorough. Do you hear my wrestle?

This is it - on my way to Israel

2008-11-02T19:49:00.001-08:00

Tomorrow we leave for (drum roll, please) Israel! I can't believe it! Robert and Sue Isham have given us this unbelievable gift! We are packed with camera batteries charging! I am taking my video camera too - the one reserved for capturing grandchildren moments. I want our special ones to feel like they are with me.
Please pray for my mom while I am gone. I know she will be lonely. If you are from Decatur, please call her or stop in for a visit while I am gone. I would really appreciate it!
Please join us in praying that the Lord will give us photographic memories for the next 11 days.
We are excited to make new friends and to get to know the six special buddies travelling with us even better.
He reigns!

Extreme Makeover: Girls' Edition

2008-10-21T19:22:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it has been over a month since I have written! What about my new commitment to write more??? Oh, well --
ACU went well - not enough time - but a blast to share for an hour and then spend a whole lot of time seeing sweet friends and hanging with my fam!

I did a ladies' day for King's Crossing Church in Corpus Christi - I LOVED it! I met some precious people and made so many new friends! I spent the night with Brenda Goforth and got to hang out with Janet Griffith - what a blessed woman I am!

Jenny, Malaya, and Rick went with me to the State Fair! What a total blast! It was on October 13 and I still feel full! I loved the friend avocado chunks and the chicken-fried bacon! Of course we had our traditional tator tornadoes, corn dogs, and Tom's lemonade! YUM! YUM!

Sunday, before the Natalie Grant concert (which was totally awesome), Wise Choices Pregnancy Resource Center held an event for young women, ages 12-14. Jeffrey Dean spoke on sexual purity! He did a terrific job! I was super proud to get to M.C. the event!

(Drum roll please!) Saturday - I cleaned out my closet!!!!! I can actually now walk in my walk-in closet! It feels great! Now if I can just decide what to do with all my 'stuff'! There is definitely a spiritual implication there. I have spent the last year looking for ways to simplify life so I can focus more clearly on glorifying the Lord. The more clutter I get rid of - the more clutter I see. Hmmmmm!

ACU Summit

2008-09-20T15:04:00.000-07:00

This has been a super exciting month! After the big San Antonio celebration, I headed to Casper, Wyoming to be with a precious group of believers. I was actually in Wyoming approximately 24 hours but made some amazing new friends! The scenery was amazing but the hearts of those women were even more beautiful. I loved my time there! What an encouragement to my heart!

Then the next weekend, Rick and I drove to Memphis to see Josh and Kayci's new place. I loved being there with them! I loved celebrating Josh's 28th birthday! One precious sister made a delicious breakfast casserole for us! What a sweet idea and blessing! Then, as we were leaving town, we ate lunch with the Alexanders, one of the shepherds at Sycamore View - wish we had more time with them! It was great to meet some Memphis folks!
Kayci and I shopped while Josh and Rick golfed! Truitt was a fabulous shopper but I know he can't wait to go golf with the guys. We went that night to eat at Rendevous - great place for ribs. We walked around downtown - stopping to eat in the Peabody Hotel and then to eat delicious cheesecake! I LOVE downtown Memphis!

Ike was hitting Houston while we were in Memphis so when we got home, Jonathan, Jennifer, Jed, and Jocelyn were at our house - our precious 'evacuees'. On Sunday Michael joined us, then came some of their other friends - the Millers. We had such a great week - such a sweet serendipity out of the tragedy of Ike. (Jonathan and Michael left Thursday to go check out the damage in Houston. Jenn and the kids left just after noon today to head to Odessa for a couple of days.)

Kayci and Truitt flew in yesterday to ride to Abilene with us tomorrow. I am speaking on Monday morning and Kayci is speaking on Wednesday morning.
I have studied so hard for this presentation - how we as communities of faith can better protect and nurture the marriages in our churches. We have to let Jesus make more of difference in our marriages because He lives in our hearts! Please pray that I am able to articulate these thoughts well.

Girls' Trip to San Antonio

2008-09-01T15:49:00.001-07:00

There were five (four adults and one very small baby) of us that converged on San Antonio, Texas, last Thursday to celebrate Jenny's 30th birthday. We had a total blast doing 'girl' things like eating and eating and eating, spending hours just sitting around talking after each meal, long naps, late movies, eating tons of chocolate!, sharing stories and dreams, encouraging each other in faith, and bonding in Jesus. We loved celebrating Jenny! We did only her favorite things! Jenny, Jessie, and I stopped at a fabulous chocolate store in Hico to buy a healing treat (chocolate bandaids) for our stressed out Jennifer. Jen was trying to leave Houston when she discovered that she had lost her wallet. BooHoo! A little chocolate helps any girlfriend feel better! (She did find her wallet within hours after she got home.)
Jocelyn seemed to thoroughly enjoy her first 'girl trip'! She never hurt for attention.

We were all there to meet her every need. She is a fabulous baby!

First night, we ate at Mi Tierra. Before we even ate dinner, we stopped at the bakery for our late night snacks. YUM! Mi Tierra has always been a family favorite for us! We sat on the patio and enjoyed the evening immensely!
This is Friday afternoon - we all layed around eating chocolate. These two slept, while Jen, Jocelyn and I were on the other bed whispering and laughing.
Here we are enjoying our Friday night walk on the River. So fun!

Happy Birthday, Jenny!

Thanks, Jennifer, Jocelyn, and Jessie for joining our celebration!

Our Day at the American Girl Store

2008-08-27T05:25:00.000-07:00

Last Friday, to celebrate the end of summer and the beginning of third grade, Jenny, Malaya, and I took Nicki (the doll) to the American Girl store at the Galleria. We have wanted to do this all summer. I wished my camera had been on Malaya when we walked in the door.

Her eyes were HUGE - priceless.
Nicki got her hair done. Malaya chose exactly how she wanted it to look - ribbons and all!
Here are the two girls at lunch. You can see Nicki's menu. Aren't they beautiful????
Here is our table at lunch. It was just beautiful - all pink - with napkin rings you could keep. They each had a character trait engraved on them.Jenny and Malaya with Nicki. Malaya asked if this could be our new tradition-- going to the American Girl store on the Friday before the first day of school. Sounds good to me! I had a blast! Thanks, girls!

Truitt was here!

2008-08-23T11:54:00.000-07:00

What a precious! Truitt was here for about 10 days

but it didn't seem long enough to get all the sugar we wanted.

Check out those eyes!
Cousin Malaya couldn't get enough of him either.

She is so so sweet with the little ones in our family.

They played so hard!

He loved to play outside in the water!

Here is in checking himself out in the mirrored window in our church.

Truitt, Grammy and Grampy miss you so much! Please come back soon!

August 21, 1976

2008-08-21T07:12:00.000-07:00

Thirty-two years ago today, Rick Ross became my man! As I listened to him speak last night at Saturn Road on commitment in marriage, my mind went back to 1976 - the excitement I felt, the anticipation, the nervousness, the uncertainty, the certainty. We were 19 - mere children but felt, oh, so adult. We have defied the odds! We have made it!
Thirty-two years! So much invested here! Three gorgeous, healthy, deeply spiritual children who have chosen awesome partners to share in our family. We have 4 amazing grandchildren! We are ministry partners.
As I am reflecting over these years today, the word 'travel' describes the 'story of us'. We love to travel together. We love our trips! But I have loved our journey of parenting and grand-parenting, of growing deeper spiritual roots together, of learning tolerance of our differences - and even learning to celebrate them.
Our history is deep - this man KNOWS me!
He knows by the way I am breathing if I am getting motion sick. When we get in the car with someone else he asks to adjust the air for me. Such a protector!
I know I am a top priority to him! He loves to make special plans for us!
I have learned to love golf! especially Tiger!
And I got an I-Pod!!!!! I can't wait to load it! ( He knew exactly what I wanted - he listens to my heart!)
I love you, Rick Ross! I am delighted I get to share my life with you! Thank you for the years of work to get us to where we are! I am anticipating continuing our travels!

Reflections on Alaska

2008-08-07T10:16:00.001-07:00

I am sitting in a Vancouver hotel room, waiting to leave for a home-bound plane and trying to decide how to put into words what I have seen over the last week. Impossible! Alaska has been an amazing place to witness the handiwork of the Almighty from a whole new perspective. Psalm 104 was my prayer of praise during our day at Glacier Bay. We had a fabulous time! I loved sharing this trip with Rick and the comfort and ease we feel when traveling together. Calvin and Virginia were ideal travel companions!

During the trip I finished Hold Me Tight - which I would highly recommend to anyone! Great read and extremely useful tools!
I also read a book that has been on my shelf much too long: "to be told: know your story, shape your future" by Dr. Dan Allender.Here are a few quotes:
*Your life and mine not only reveal who we are but they also help reveal who God is.
*Adversity introduces us to ourselves.
*Paradoxically, we're moving toward the discovery of something we don't yet know but have already received.
*A dream without suffering is little more than a fantasy.
*...you can be assured that the inciting events call for you to sacrifice your comfort and ease in order for your story to move forward.
*In the midst of affliction, we become either our truest or our most false self.
*God writes our story not just for our own enlightenment and insight, but to enlighten others and to reveal His own story through our story.
*What we do is what we really value.
What we value enough to do tells others what we really believe.
What we really believe shapes what we will become.
*...what we do matters little compared to how we do it.
*An absence of gratitude with regard to our present compels us to change it rather than be
transformed by it.

Vancouver

2008-07-30T10:35:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was an awesome, beautiful, contagiously delightful,.... day (I keep trying to use the abc's to describe it). We had high tea at the Empress Hotel in Victoria and drove over to Berchart Gardens (I think I misspelled the name) which were TOTALLY amazing. The gardens were built over on old lime quarry. It was raining so they were not crowded at all - the gardens passed out umbrellas so there was no problem continuing to enjoy the sights. We were walking along enjoying the view, talking, and laughing then we rounded the corner to one of the most gorgeous scenes I have ever witnessed. It took my breath and my words away - only for a second - ha!The color was spectacular! The rose garden was indescribable too! The aroma was heavenly!
I don't want to skip over the high tea experience. We had a great time! I want to have the experience with my little grand-daughters. I love moments where formal and casual meet. It reminded me how much I love entertaining, how much I want to have relaxed table experiences with the people I love and value. I have a cabinet full of teapots, cups, and saucers. I want to get 'em out and have some fun!
We are having such a good time together. I love laughing and trying new things. We leave in an hour to head to our cruise ship. We will take off this evening for Alaska. My toes may be cold but I can't take off my flip-flops! Hopefully, I will be able to blog from the ship.

Up, up, and away!

2008-07-28T09:34:00.001-07:00

The retreat is over. It was a delightful blast! I love that we are part of a community of faith that values marriage and that so many people are willing to set a weekend aside every year to explore some tools to create more intimate relationships. Thanks a million times to Kyle and Shelly Reeves! They are the backbone of this event. Nobody has a clue how much they spend in money and time to make this event happen. They believe that if one family is helped, it was worth it all. That is how the evil one will be defeated - through willing to go shoulder to shoulder beside each other as we all struggle to be overcomers (as Revelation would put it). The discussion at this year's retreat was so rich and so deep. It is a sacred moment when someone gathers the courage to share a painful leg of their journey and so many people of faith rush in to support.
The only downer of this year's retreat is that I got home without my Bible - boohoo! I had tons of help packing up so I thought someone had accidentally pick it up. I was beginning to worry about myself - can you go to heaven if you lose your Bible????? (Just kidding) Anyway, the hotel called the morning - after two phone calls from me - they found it!!!! Yea!
I will be stopping by the hotel on the way to the airport. We are on our way to Alaska! with our friends, Calvin and Virginia Buchanan. I am hoping to blog while we are on the ship but we will see. My firstborn turns 30 on Sunday, August 3 - yes, I will still be gone. We will celebrate well when I return. She is a blessing!

Marriage Retreat Tonight

2008-07-25T11:19:00.000-07:00

We leave in a few hours to drive over the Dallas where about 16 couples from church are meeting us to spend tonight and tomorrow discussing marriage. I want us to really 'get' our deep need for attachment and explore why on this earth we are so desperately afraid of it. Dr. Sue Johnson says the only fears greater than our fear of attachment are the fear of death and the fear of combat. Our desire for attachment needs take us to such a vulnerable, sometime raw, place. Dr. Johnson believes that arguments are not about issues but about attachment. What John Gottman calls signs of contempt, Sue Johnson calls attachment panic - when we believe that we have reached out for attachment, however inappropriately, and it has been rebuffed. Attachment comes across in a variety of ways - one of which is anger. So much to say on this...more later-

Time in Houston

2008-07-21T09:39:00.000-07:00

I love Mondays! Our class meets tonight and I so look forward to our time together!

My trip to Houston was a blast! Here are some highlights:

*Jenny and Malaya driving in from Keller

*Worshipping while Jonathan led singing and Josh taught

*Watching Malaya and Jed play together

*Taking Josh to the airport and hearing about Memphis

*Eating at Gringo's and sharing a meal with Jen; watching Jed eat ice cream

*Bath time with Jed and Jocelyn

*Prayer time at night with Jed

*Watching several episodes of The Young Riders (I love that show!)

*Hearing Jed say "adorable" when I ask him what I thought about him

*Seeing Jocelyn's brand new really big smiles

*Talks with Jen about some things that are important and some things that don't matter at all
(just fun)

Mon Night Group and Thoughts on Attachment

2008-07-16T06:31:00.000-07:00

I love our Monday night study group. We have several women from the community meeting for two hours to work through Kelly Simpson's Active Healthy Relationships program. The camaraderie is delightful and the discussion is rich! I have such a passion to give young women a forum to be intentional about living the lives that will get them what they want more than anything. These women are amazing and am thrilled to share time with them!
I am working through Sue Johnson's book: Hold Me Tight. She says that what we all want than anything is secure, safe relationships. Our hearts long for authentic attachment to another. I so believe her! This book is fabulous - and so challenging.
Due to the move in our culture toward independence, we have become more self-focused than relationship-focused and it is not serving us well. I witness the sadness of way too many because of a disconnect from others. We suffer from the ongoing wounding of our childhood - a childhood that maybe taught us that people are not safe; that people cannot be trusted to love well; that we will be hurt by loving/caring about another; that we hurt others that we want to love.
My question would be: how on earth do we enter into 'safe, secure' relationships without the indwelling of the Holy Spirit or the covering of the blood of Jesus or the warmth of the mercy/grace of God. I am fully aware that outside of Kingdom of God people can have good, successful marriages but they are missing the penetrating purpose. There is sweetness found in new mercies every morning that propels a freshness like none other!
Just wanted to share a few thoughts stirring in my head before I hit the road for Houston, Spring really. Josh (our son who recently moved to Memphis) is coming to speak at Jonathan's (our son in Houston) church tonight. Jenny and Malaya will drive up too. I will stay until Sunday loving on Jed and Jocelyn! But for tonight, I will have 3 grand ones under one roof (wish Truitt could be there!). I can't wait!

The Shack

2008-07-13T14:59:00.000-07:00

The Shack is a must-read! I found it super challenging and am writing this post so I can begin - only begin - to sort through some thoughts as I wrestle with them. At the same time, I am experiencing a loss for words (that's when I know I am really wrestling!)
The forgiveness element of this book is what has me gripped. Those of you who hear my soapboxes from time to time know that I believe that bitterness (the lack of forgiveness) continues to hold God's chosen in shackles although He has released us. We continue to dance in pain even after the Lord has called us to dance in freedom.

Here are two quotes that are stewing in my head:
Jesus talking to Mack (page 148 and 149):
"But your independence with its quest for power and fulfillment actually destroys the relationship your heart longs for."
"Apart from my life inside of you, you can't submit to (your wife), or your children, or anyone else in you life, including Papa (God)."
God, to Mack, about forgiveness (page 189):
"People are tenacious when it comes to the treasure of their imaginary independence. They hoard and hold their sickness with a firm grip. They find their identity and worth in their brokenness and guard it with every ounce of strength they have. No wonder grace has such little attraction. In that sense you have tried to lock the door of your heart from the inside. ... There are many folks like you, Mackenzie, who end up locking themselves into a very small place with a monster that will ultimately betray them, that will not fill or deliver what they thought it would. Imprisoned with such a terror, they once again have the opportunity to return to me. The very treasure they trusted in will become their undoing."

Isn't that just like Satan to convince us that we are taking care of ourselves, protecting our own hearts, when really all we are doing is refusing the only true healing. I want to be willing to do the work myself and to encourage other people in this journey of life to step into the freedom of forgiveness - whether is sometime done to us or something we have done. May we recognize His covering of grace and mercy and wear it well!

Home again, home again, jiggity jiggity, jig, jig

2008-07-12T18:47:00.000-07:00

As a little girl, that is what we always said as we drove into our driveway after a trip.
Our trip home was very eventful - oh, maybe not so eventful but definitely exhausting. We got to the airport in time for Rick to fly out at 1:30 (right after lunch) - didn't happen - and we pulled in our driveway together at 4:30 AM! But it did give me time to finish my Nice Girls Don't Change the World book and get almost done with The Shack - a total must-read!
First, I want to share a couple of quotes from the Nice Girls book:
"Then I came face to face with the realization that disappointing people is the greatest fear of the nice girl. It truly was my deepest fear."
"Fear magnifies our weaknesses and it hides our potential."
"When fear says, 'You are going to disappoint people so badly,' I say, 'Well, maybe so, but I guess I'd rather take the risk of disappointing people by not being good enough than disappoint God by not being brave enough."
"... the opposite of being a nice girl is not just a good woman, but a downright dangerous woman. A woman who shows up with everything she is and joins the battle against whatever opposes the redeeming work of God in our lives and in our world. A dangerous woman delves deeply into the truth of who she is, grounds herself daily in the healing and empowering love of God, and radically engages with the needs of the world."
Oh yeah, I want to be a dangerous woman on the Lord's side - a woman where my greatest fear is not disappointing people but where the only thing I fear is not becoming everything the Lord has set for me to be in Him!

Yesterday was Jenny and David's ten year anniversary! Hey, you two, we celebrate with you and for you! Your marriage is a blessing to witness! You make a great team. David, I cannot imagine our fam without you!!!

A Few Minutes at Pebble Beach

2008-07-09T21:50:00.000-07:00

We have had a fantastic time in California! Today, we rented a car again - this time heading south around the Monterrey Peninsula. We stopped to take in the Pacific every few minutes - to watch the sea lions and the birds, and, of course, use every restroom along the way - ha! On one of the overlooks, we met a couple from Tomball. Their son is the youth minister for Metropolitan Baptist Church in Houston. (What's the old saying - 6 degrees of separation, or is it 9?)
We ate a late breakfast in Half Moon Bay - I had pumpkin pancakes and we split a potato dish that was really yummy! (I am writing this so I don't forget that I really like pumpkin pancakes. Wouldn't that be delicious on Thanksgiving morning???)
Then...we started on the 17 mile scenic drive through several world famous golf courses, ending in Pebble Beach! Gorgie-porgie!! We got out and walked as much as we could without paying the $525 to play - that would be EACH! Just to think I have watched history made there! The homes around it are incredible! A man working in the pro shop told us that 3 of the homes that are 'for sale' are going for $30 million! Who has ever heard of that many zeroes????? for a house? What do these people do?
Rick has been so enthusiastic in his love for golf courses that it has been undeniably contagious! I love being on them. I love the smell! I love the crisp look of a really, really good one. I love the quiet (I know - can you believe it??) But most of all - I LOVE Rick's face when he is on one! He loved Pebble Beach and so did I!
We head home tomorrow. I should have time to finish my Nice Girls book and start The Shack.
I am excited to sleep with my own pillows tomorrow night.

I love vacation days!

2008-07-08T19:29:00.000-07:00

Since the conference was over Monday evening, Rick and I have taken in California as fast as possible. Yesterday, we spent the morning down at Golden Gate Park. It totally reminded us of Central Park in NYC. You step into such serenity. Then we got back on the bus (I am getting this public transportation thing down!) so we could go down to Fisherman's Wharf (had great clam chowder in bread bowls - yum!) and just hung-out at all the shops and spent a few minutes watching the sea lions while we talked to our family and caught up a bit. Then we caught a boat for am evening tour of Alcatraz. (Rick is an amazing travel agent! He reserved our spot for this cruise online months ago.) I found it hard to believe that people could survive those conditions. Some of the stories were so sad!
Today we got a rent car (again a Rick-online-reservation) and drove up this incredibly beautiful coast to Muir Woods. On our way out of San Fran, we stopped on Lombard Street to walk the crooked part. I tried to take pictures but without the video with my huffing and puffing for sound effects, the struggle gets lost. We hiked all the way down and then back up again. What a sight! While at Muir Wood, I learned that these humongous trees have what is called Family Circles. Their shared root systems make them stronger. Whew! Stay tuned for spiritual applications with that one! We had such a good time being together!
Tomorrow, our plan is to go south to Monterey Peninsula - heard it is gorgeous! Hopefully we can eat some seafood while we are there.
This week, I have finished reading Same Kind of Different as Me. Perfect timing - or maybe not - to be hanging in a city with such a prolific homeless population. I am learning so much about myself!

Last Day of Conference

2008-07-06T21:33:00.000-07:00

I spent all day in one workshop with Sue Johnson, author of Hold Me Tight, an emotionally-focused therapy book.
Here are a few quotes from the day:

Before you even know how you feel, it is registered on your face.

Love is not about perfect performance but emotional presence.

Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant with the weak and the wrong.
Sometime in your life you will have been all of these.
(quote by Lloyd Shearer)

If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else. (quote by Yogi Berra)

At the first break, I met Rick and Bekki Cotton who live in Granbury and go to church in Duncanville. Cool!

Tonight we went to Bubba Gumps on Fisherman's Wharf for supper. So fun! But... I had a little trouble with the public transportation. We rode a trolley to get down to the wharf. The seats were full so I was standing. As soon as the trolley took off, I almost fell and I stepped on this older woman's foot. I apologized so sweetly but she wasn't buying it. The trolley stopped and I regained my footing. Then it took off again and this time I almost sat on her. I apologized again but could not stop laughing. The next stop she jumped up and loudly proclaimed, "I have to get off here." She huffed and puffed off. Well, that left her seat open. There was a pregnant woman standing and I offered, while I was cracking up, to let her have the seat but she, laughing too, said that I better take it. I quickly thanked her, agreed, and sat the rest of the way. I am still laughing!!!!! I can't wait to ride again tomorrow. Rick decided to take a taxi back to our hotel. Oh, what a roller coaster ride!!! Whew! I took 2 Dramamine and am very grateful! My head is still spinning!

Tomorrow, we are play all day. We are planning to go back to the wharf, via the trolley, I'm sure, and go on cruise-tour of Alcatraz tomorrow night. Can't wait!!!

Day Three of Conference

2008-07-05T18:40:00.000-07:00

We are resting a bit before we go to hear John Gray (When Mars and Venus Collide) from 7:30-10:00 - but I want to recap this day before we go. We ate supper at an Irish Pub - the first time I can ever remembering ordering lamb. It was good but... oh, let me recap the info of the day - not the food.

First thing this morning, the plenary speaker was Dr. Sue Johnson. I will spend all day with her tomorrow. I am so excited for the opportunity because she was amazing today! She is the author of Emotional-Focused Therapy.
Some of her quotes:
"How to understand the great emotional bond and the great source of pain (love) is the greatest treasure hunt of mankind."

Isolation is more dangerous physically than smoking.
Your brain codes emotional isolation as danger.
You become emotionally 'stuck' when the person you go to for safe attachment creates isolation.

The code of attachment tells us that the primary need is to feel secure with another.

All arguments are about the power of emotional connection:
*Are you there for me?
*Are you accessible for me?
*Are you responsive to my needs?
*Are you engaged with me?
Emotional presence is solution.

Criticism by someone you love creates relapse in any 'issue' - ex. depression.

(more from her tomorrow - I can't wait!)

Dr. David Carder - on Close Calls: How to Affair-Proof Your Marriage

The power of a temptation lies in its timing.

High risk times for affair:
Following a loss
In a life transition
During pregnancy or within 18 following birth (he has done extensive research on pastors and this has proven to be their most vulnerable time)

Most pastors who have affairs do so between ages 31 and 40 (43.9%).
Over 70% of pastors having affairs do so before the age of 40, with a huge % of those never reported to their 'people'.

The following list include the characteristics for alcoholics to relapse and they also lower barriers for affair prevention. When we are:
hungry
angry
lonely
tired
bored

Father God, please teach us how self-care so that our hearts do not become the devil's playground. Fill us, as Your people, with wisdom and discernment to eat and rest well. Guard our minds that anger does not settle in. Help us to use every opportunity to practice forgiveness so bitterness does not take up room in our hearts. Fill us with Your presence and Your passion so that we do not let loneliness and boredom become fertilizer for the Evil One. We desperately want to bring You glory and honor in the way we do marriage.

Day Two of Conference

2008-07-04T16:42:00.001-07:00

Happy Fourth of July! This was my precious Dad's favorite holiday. He loved when we celebrated with him - he didn't really care what we ate as long as there was watermelon to top it off. My mom is so sad today. It doesn't help that I am at this conference in San Fran. I have been thinking about her all day - and praying for her.

This day has been full and so rich! Right before lunch I heard someone calling my name - it was Charles and Judy Siburt. We just love them! We walked to a diner for lunch but had to eat at the counter so we are meeting again tonight to walk to an Italian place so we can visit and catch up.

I do want to journal some of my notes from the day.
Markman and Stanley (researchers) opened the day. Here is some of their quotes --
Commitment is the choice to give up other choices.
One fourth of the teen girls in America now have STD's.
48.7% women reported a negative reaction to 'hooking up' sex; while 51% of men reported a positive reaction.

David Olson--
5 Best predictors of a Happy Marriage --
*Commitment
*Flexibility
*Closeness
*Personality compatability
*Conflict Resolution

Flexibility and closeness are the two that are new and are teachable.

Scott Stanley-- Sliding vs. Deciding
Too many people today are sliding through really big transitions then making decisions later.
(He's talking about relationships.)
My reflection of this last sentence: I want to work with the teen girls that I teach on how to break up. Nice girls don't know how and frequently get 'stuck' in relationships that are not emotionally healthy or safe because they have no clue how to get out. I don't want these girls to have life-long consequences because they slid. I want to be about the business of empowering then to be wise and discerning about relationships.

Tomorrow should be an amazing day! We end the day with a keynote by John Gray. He is so entertaining! In case I haven't said it lately: I LOVE my job! I LOVE my whole life! Rick, I am delighted you came with me to San Francisco!

Day One of Conference

2008-07-03T18:02:00.000-07:00

I want to write out of few thoughts from the first day of the Smart Marriage conference mostly by sharing some quotes from a few of the speakers.

Gary Chapman's keynote: No one has ever died from breaking off an affair. Some have died from continuing them. No one ever regrets doing what's right.

His new book comes out July 15 entitled: Love as a Way of Life (doesn't that sound like something Jesus would just love?)
Does love stand a chance in this country? Love is our only chance!

2 essentials to a positive long-term relationship:
1. both partners feeling loved and appreciated
2. both knowing how to deal effectively with their own failures

From his class on The Five Languages of Apology:
Life's true meaning is found in relationships, also life's deepest pain.

Why do some people choose not to apologize:
fear the consequences of admitting the offense
don't value the relationship
have personality or esteem issues

On teaching children to apologize:
*teach them to take responsibility
*help them understand that their actions affect other people
*life has rules
*apologies are necessary when we hurt others
*teach them the five languages of apology
*teach them by your example

Dave Carder's class: An affair contains the following three components--
1. childhood magic - totally free of responsibility
2. Adolescent sexuality - exciting, spontaneous (like in a car - ha!)
3. adult mobility - business trips, choose to see each other in time that are not "regular" or easy
Healthy marriages-work involves maintaining all three.

John Van Epp's keynote: Years ago, research revealed that teenage marriages had a high rate of instability so the marriage age began to be pushed way up. For a period of time the slogan taught was 'marry later, marry better'. What we now know is that when the marriage age is anywhere from 21-30, higher stability is more likely to occur. But some people who wait until later to marry are more likely to be sexually permissive, have higher rates of substance abuse, have higher rates of cohabitation, and show higher acceptance of out-of-marriage births.

It has been a good day at the conference. Rick and I are about to leave to go to a banquet - always a highlight at the conference.

Off to San Francisco!

2008-07-01T20:52:00.000-07:00

We leave tomorrow for the Smart Marriage conference in San Fran! I LOVE this conference! I want to be a sponge for 4 1/2 days. Rick is going with me to read and hang out.
I am trying to tie up loose ends tonight before being gone for 9 days and blogging made my list.

Jennifer, Jed, and Jocelyn spent last week with us. Jonathan came in Tuesday night so he could speak at church Wed night. He was amazing! I was just bustin' proud of him! Wednesday was his 25th birthday. We had a blast being with them. I'll post pictures soon. Jen got her hair cut while they were here and it is adorable!

I am currently reading "Same Kind of Different as Me" by Ron Hall and Denver Moore. I came across this quote last night during the discussion that followed Ron asking Denver to be his friend (Ron is a wealthy white man; Denver is a homeless black man):
Denver -- "I heard that when white folks go fishin they do somthin called 'catch and release'. That really bothers me. I just can't figure it out. 'Cause when colored folks go fishin, we really proud of what we catch, and we take it and show it off to everybody that'll look. Then we eat what we catch ... in other words, we use it to sustain us. So it really bothers me that white folks would go to all that trouble to catch a fish, then when they done caught it, just throw it back in the water."
"So, Mr. Ron, it occurred to me: If you is fishin for a friend you just gon' catch and release, then I ain't got no desire to be your friend."
"But if you is looken for a real friend, then I'll b e one. Forever."
Denver, continuing to reflect: "Bein friends is like being soldiers in the army. You live together; you fight together; you die together."
Ron promised not to 'catch and release.'

It is a great book!

Introducing Jocelyn Brooke Ross!

2008-06-05T19:08:00.001-07:00

Like father, like son - Jed and Jonathan

They both have toothpicks in their mouth.

Josh, Kayci, and Truitt left for Memphis Monday morning.

This is the picture before they hit the road.

Here she is!

Jocelyn Brooke was born Monday, June 2, at 12:57.

She weighed 7 lbs 14 oz. and was 20 3/4 inches long.

This picture was taken about 5 hours after she was born on Monday.

Please note she is already in her carseat since she came home three hours after birth!

Isn't she precious in her bow!

Jocelyn with her family (doesn't Jen look great????) This pic is on Tuesday.

Here she is talking to me on Wednesday morning before we had to leave! Isn't she beautiful?????

A little of this and a little of that...

2008-06-02T07:58:00.000-07:00

This morning has been a whirlwind of excitement! Josh and Kayci - and our precious Truitt - are on their way to Memphis. Josh is the new pulpit minister for the Sycamore View Church of Christ there and it sounds like such an exciting opportunity! We are so proud of them and for them! Their house sounds like it is totally amazing. Can't wait to see it! But it was so hard to say good-bye - boohoo! Can't wait to hear all their stories about life in Tennessee!

Right before they left, Jonathan called from Houston to tell us that Jen is probably in labor! So today we could get to meet Jocelyn Brooke Ross! I cannot to see her! We should know something shortly. I am trying to tie up some loose ends this morning so I can make a fairly quick exit.

Summer is here! It is June! I cannot shake my former school teacher mode (and don't think I want to) that summer is the time to catch-up and do the things you want to do all year but don't have time. I treasure these months of the year!
This summer I plan to:
*sit out on my patio and drink ice tea with lemon and lime and watch my Missouri primrose bloom every night;
*read several books that are on my too-important-not-to-read list (Same Kind of Different as Me, The Shack, To Be Told, Dr. Worthington's book on Forgiveness);
*hang out with my man!

The preacher at our church, who I think is the best lookin' preacher anywhere and who I happened to be married to, shared yesterday that grace and peace go together - they are like friends. Grace is always first because without grace there is no real peace. Until you recognize that you are grace-covered, you cannot rest in peace.
Just thought I would share - May the Lord bless you with His grace and His peace!

Daddy

2008-05-16T13:19:00.000-07:00

Ok - here goes - I have put off writing this blog because it just doesn't seem real yet and, somehow, by writing it, it gives it more permanence. Such a heavy, heavy time. On April 29, our phone rang about 6:30 and I could hear my mom trying to talk. She was finally able to get out that she thought my dad was dead.
Rick and I flew out the door. It was true. A day we had known was coming had arrived. Two and a half weeks later I still feel like I am functioning in the mode Daddy prepared me to handle. We discussed his death many times and he told me to take care of my mom which I am desperately trying to do. (Her heart is breaking.) On the Saturday before he died, he told me he wanted a funeral in Decatur because they had made such good friends here. He said he wanted it as soon as possible after he died. And he told me that he wanted me to stand by his casket and thank each person for coming. My dad knew how he wanted to live and he knew how he wanted to die. He was and is one to be in charge when things get confusing for the rest of us. He continues to minister to me now with that steady reassurance.
This morning Mom rode with me to get my nails done and we discussed how sweet the Lord's timing is - I am grateful that I got to sit through Rick's series on heaven earlier this year and gather some thoughts about the place where Dad is enjoying rest.
Lori Lowe gave Mom a poem that she told me today has ministered to her beautifully. When I asked her what part meant the most to her, she responded 'the part about me having to let him go and his promise that he would meet me with a smile when I get to heaven."
This is a really wierd time in life.

Learning to Love

2008-04-15T08:58:00.000-07:00

I love that concept - learning to step into love a bit better, maybe with more wisdom. In Denver last year at a marriage conference I heard a speaker say that research is being done on happiness levels and that so far it appears the greatest happiness in life comes not from being loved well but from loving another really, really well. Now I ask you, doesn't that sound just like God to wire us like that??? The idea began with observing new mothers loving their babies - with no return yet - just learning to love well.

On Tuesday mornings, I meet with a small group of mothers to study the Word. We are currently in Philippians. I was awe-struck last week by the words in chapter 1, verses 9-11, from the Message:

So this is my prayer: that your love will flourish and that you will not only love much but well. Learn to love appropriately. You need to use your head and test your feelings so that your love is sincere and intelligent, not sentimental gush. Live a lover's life, circumspect and exemplary, a life Jesus will be proud of: bountiful in fruits from the soul, making Jesus Christ attractive to all, getting everyone involved in the glory and praise of God.

Happy New Year!

2008-01-05T07:24:00.000-08:00

Malaya shows off an extra-large 'Santa' grin. She is our precious!

Rick and the grand-ones on New Year's Eve. Aren't they a darling group?
Truitt Ross was a blast on his first Christmas! We are delighted he is here!
Barbie, my sister, and me with our parents on Christmas Day. We were so glad they could all be here with us!
Jed already has a burning desire to preach! The more people stared and smiled at him during his 'sermon', the more fired up he became!

Christmas was a total delight this year! It was our year to have everyone with us on Christmas Eve and Day and it was full of laughter, food, long talks, playing, and more laughter with joy on top!

As I move in to plans for 2008, I have one word I choose to pray through: simplify. I don't know all it means or what it looks like but I am begging the Lord to teach me and reveal to me ways He wants to manifest Himself in and through me by way of the simple. I think a good place to start will involve garbage bags and a journal - not at the same time but definitely connected.

I pray rich blessings on you, my precious friends - rich blessings of God's presence and fulfillment. I pray that this year we can find some time to chat over enchiladas and I can hear more life stories. I want to spend some time with 'my people' bragging on the Lord God Almighty!!!!

Thanksgiving!

2007-11-21T11:10:00.000-08:00

I have been reading some research that says that our brains are not wired to feel anxiety and thanksgiving at the same time. Isn't that just like God to remind us over and over and over in the Word - Don't worry but, rather, be thankful. To be thankful is a choice. It is a mindset. To wrap my own head around this concept, here is the beginning of my 'I am thankful for ...' list:

My precious husband, who is more like Jesus everyday
My children all love the Lord and passionately serve Him
My three precious grandchildren!!!!!
My parents - that they enjoy health and we enjoy having them close
My church family
My job - I LOVE going to work everyday!
Our Tuesday morning study group with young moms
So many wonderful friends
The written Word
The Living, Breathing Word
The Spirit - His indwelling and His empowerment
The concept of marriage
God's redeeming heart
Jesus' story
Books
Highlighters

Confession!

2007-11-04T15:19:00.000-08:00

I have allowed myself to become too busy - too busy to be who I desperately want to be. I am suffering from what Randy Frazee calls "crowded loneliness" so there are some changes coming! I have already accepted 4 speaking engagements on weekends from January through May (2 of those are with Rick) but I am not going to be taking on anything else for this season. I am going to be reinvestigating my life and adjusting a few details. I want to spend some time 'breaking up my unplowed ground' and seeking the Lord with all my heart.
Hosea 10: 12 was shared in a devo recently and it really has been playing in my heart:
"Sow for ourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love, and break up your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the LORD, until He comes and showers righteousness on you."
Blessings, sweet friends, in your jouney with the Lord and may He bless our hearts with deeper spiritual roots in the days to come!

Happy Birthday, Rick!!!

2007-10-09T16:15:00.000-07:00

We have had a blast celebrating Rick' 51st birthday! We have eaten at Landry's, Uncle Julio's, the Paradise Cafe! Does it get any better? He is an awesome man! I love being married to someone who has made it his life goal to look more and more like Jesus. I love my life with him! I am a better woman because Rick Ross is part of my life! Today (and yesterday), we celebrate you!

Exodus 1-2

2007-09-21T08:39:00.000-07:00

This morning on Good Morning America one of the guests was a college professor who just found out he has 3-6 months to live. His teaching has changed - he wants his 3 young children ( and his college students) to KNOW his values not just facts about his life.
I have been thinking alot about 'telling the next generation' through my study of Exodus:
Have you ever pondered what it must have been like for the people of God between Genesis and Exodus? How deafening is the silence of God?!?!?! I wonder how often and with what enthusiasm they repeated Joseph's words found in Gen. 50: "surely God will come to your aid" (and his prophetic words: 'when He does get my bones outta here!')
What did their mamas tell them about faith?
Isn't it also so very interesting the tremendous compassion revealed first in women and then contagiously invading the men - ha! Pharaoh's daughter was 'deeply moved' by seeing a breathing baby in the Nile - Wow! Moses' mom compassionately making a basket; his sister compassionately hovering in the weeds. Oh, and you can't forget the midwives who, in their compassion, tricked Pharaoh at his own game!
Then Moses' great compassion for his 'own' people - how did he know? His deep concern rushed ahead of God's call. He was ready to play deliverer before the Deliverer told him how and when. But I love the end of Ex. 2 - when Heaven begins to roar with compassion - something (Someone) is about to be stirrin' on earth!
I LOVE Exodus!

Done, done, done, done, done, done, done

2007-09-09T19:26:00.000-07:00

The title is a quote from Malaya a few years ago when she was ready to go home after looking at lights on Christmas Eve. The saying has just 'stuck' to show when I am really finished - I mean totally finished - with something.
My fundraiser for the year is over! On August 30, about 70 people gathered to eat a meal and hear testimonies from some of my clients and a highly motivational talk by Ty Lovell, the minister at Crossroads Community Church here in Decatur. When the night was over, we had raised a little over $19,000 - with pledges, the total is almost $45,000 for the year! May the Lord be praised! I get to work here another year!
I love my job! I have such a passion for this ministry!
Psalm 90: 17 was the verse for the event: "May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us -- yes, establish the work of our hands."

Today Rick and Jacob challenged us to Give 60 for the Master. They encouraged us to get our hands dirty in some kind of volunteer work outside of the walls of our building. So many ideas floating around:
WARM, CASA, the Domestic Violence Task Force are a few places that need help.
There is a young woman in a convalescent center that needs someone to read to her.
There are people to visit and encourage.
I am excited and eager to hear what people find to do to be the hands and feet of Jesus in Wise County!
May He definitely establish the work of our hands!!!!

The Best of Summer '07

2007-08-25T12:33:00.000-07:00

August 27 - the first day of school - may it be a new beginning of blogs for me! I became a 'grammy' of 3 and disappeared to play for a few months. But I want back in!!! This summer has been full of rich blessings! I have come up with a list of my top 12 most favorite things about the summer of '07. (Drum roll please, Rick):

Jed, Malaya, and Truitt sharing

a 'cousin moment' on vacation.

1.) Jed's First Birthday Bash! Our first time to have all 3 grand ones together!
2.) Truitt's Baby Blessings (Rick got to speak)
3.) Many trips to Houston - the road has gotten so much shorter!
4.) Going to Smart Marriage conference in Denver with Rick
5.) Jed and Jen staying with us!
6.) Taking Malaya and Jed to the zoo
7.) Vacation at Lake Conroe
8.) Studying with a group of young mothers on Wednesday morning - so many new friends!
9.) Watching High School Musical 2 with Malaya
10.) Celebrating 31 years with Rick
11.) Planning for my fund-raiser which is this Thursday
12.) Studying Exodus - getting ready for the fall ladies' class - I totally cannot wait!

Today, I had lunch with a group of mothers who had just dropped their children off at school. We met to pray over this school year. May it be rich with opportunities to shine Jesus!

I've been trying to get more pics on here but having real trouble - stay tuned.

Introducing Truitt Ross

2007-05-11T14:39:00.000-07:00

I finally did it! Here he is! Joshua Truitt Ross! Isn't he gorgeous?!?

We are so excited! He was born on May 5, weighing 6 pounds and 4 ounces - 20 inches long. Check out his blog for more pics: truittross.blogspot. com. Today is his Mommy and Daddy's 5 year anniversay. Happy, happy, Josh and Kayci! We love you and are so proud of you! Thanks for giving us such a doll to love! We can't wait 'til Thursday! (That one pic is of both our sons with their sons - aren't they all adorable? Jenny and David are on their way to Houston to introduce Malaya - more pics to come.)

Truitt has a high bilirubin count - home health is bringing over a light to keep him under. Please pray for him - and his Mommy and Daddy.

Truitt is coming!

2007-05-05T08:54:00.000-07:00

Today is the day - we got the call this morning and we are heading to Houston. Josh are Kayci are at the hospital - they are keeping her! I am gathering my cameras and running to get packed but wanted to write a quick message seeking prayer coverage over this day and the days to come. I'll write more as soon as we know details - like hopefully, very soon!
(I know I have been lax in writing lately - but retreat season is officially over and I plan on slowing down a bit beginning ... well, soon.)
I love you, my friends!

Proud Mama!

2007-04-02T19:44:00.000-07:00

Check out Brandon Scott Thomas' blog from yesterday! This mama is beaming! BST writes about Josh and the comments include both "Ross boys". The address is brandonscottthomas.blogspot.com.

I'm home!

2007-04-01T19:57:00.000-07:00

Six days ago, I landed back in Texas - a very tired, but extremely energized woman! (Is that possible?!?!?!) I LOVED my time in Africa! The safari was a super (stay tuned for pics); the scenery gorgeous; but the friends - oh, my! I was so blessed! The Lord was so good as He showered me with sweet, precious relationships! I have tons of picures to post this week. I will try to write and highlight some of the highlights throughout the week.
I would love to take Rick back to meet all my new friends!
Only one week until Easter! I LOVE EASTER!!!! The empty tomb makes me want to dance and celebrate! Isn't it totally delightful that we serve a risen Lord!?!?

I'm off!!! and leaving as a 50-year-old!

2007-03-12T21:18:00.001-07:00

Well, this is it -- I leave for Africa in a little over 12 hours! It has been a great week - full of rich memories! Last Wednesday I turned 50 and the celebration began! Rick took me away on a very relaxing day away. We spent the night at the Hilton Thursday night, hung around on Sundance Square, and ate dessert at Marble Slab (YUM)! Then spent Friday back and forth between the Botanical Gardens and the Stockyards -- only to get kidnapped at Joe T.'s!! My family was waiting on me there! What a surprise!!!!
Then home to 'hang out' -- SURPRISE!!! What a great party with my friends from church! I love our church family!
Can't wait to share stories from my time in Africa!!!
Rick, I love you more than I have words to tell you! I count it a HUGE blessing to share like with a man becoming more like Jesus every day! There will not be a moment you will not be in my thoughts! You make my dreams come true! I will so miss your touch and your smile! Only a few day, my man, only a few days!
My children, you are the best! I treasure what the Lord is doing in each of you! May you continue to hold strong in the faith!
Malaya, you have changed my life forever! I love looking at the Lord through your precious innocent eyes! I can't wait to read your sweet notes!
Jed, I love you emerging personality! I woke up this morning thinking of how it will be to hear you say 'Jesus'!
Truitt, I can't wait to hold you! and to add to my picture collection! You are already being covered in prayer!

Blessings, sweet friends and family!

Pleading for prayer over our trip

2007-03-03T18:45:00.000-08:00

Well, it is ten days until our little group leaves for Kenya and I want to beg you to lift your voices to the Lord on our behalf. We will not be able to one thing without Him! There are some general prayer requests that have gone out on behalf of the entire team but I want to ask you, friends and family, to pray the following for me:
* For may family's health while I am away, especially my dad and my pregnant daughter-in-law.
* For my clients since I will be gone 2 weeks.
* That Rick will be protected and not feel alone.
* For the flights over and back to be smooth, easy, and free of motion-sickness and anxiety.
* For wisdom and discernment in this ministry.
* That I will rest in Him and serve in His strength.
* That our team will be of one heart so that God will be glorified and magnified.
* That the Lord will use this experience to further caputure our hearts.
* My parents will be moving to Decatur while I am gone! Can you believe it? Pray that goes well for them and that they will be calm in my absence.
* Please pray for our God to cover our team with His traveling mercies!
* I will be facilitating a workshop on grief - please pray the Lord will use our time together to work His healing.

Thank you so much! I would be delighted to pray over you while I am gone. Please send me your requests! What a blessing we have when we take each other's name to the throne of the Almighty! Amen and Amen!

Two Weeks from Today!

2007-02-27T15:24:00.000-08:00

Two weeks from today, on March 13, I will leave with Come before Winter ministries for a trip to Africa. Come before Winter is a group of women that travel together to host missionary women in a weeklong mission - our aim is to provide them with rest, refreshment, and renewal from Monday through Friday. For this trip, the destination is the coast of Kenya. We are all stressing over the current luggage issues and the shots and various departure dates - but when we get there, our hearts will be one and we will lay aside all 'issues' for the common goal of ministry. I love that! Sixteen girlfriends with one heart and one aim for two weeks! Yes, Lord!

A Thought about Love

2007-01-30T12:45:00.000-08:00

I could not help but sense the intense sadness of the vet and the owners that had to make the decision to euthanize Barbaro. Wow! They worked so hard for so long!
As a professional counselor who deals with grieving people on a regular basis, there was a quote by one of Barbaro's owners that struck my heart: "Grief is the price we pay to love."
Ah, yes, it is! Love is risky - always a sacrifice at some level. What we have to decide over and over is if it is worth the risk. Healthy love is always worth stepping into more, truth?

Happy New Year!

2007-01-02T15:09:00.000-08:00

Well, this is it! 2007 is officially in full-swing for this girl. Back in the office and back to trying to catch up.
I loved our holiday season this year! Jed's first Christmas with us was a blast! We have taken great delight in watching Malaya open gifts for 7 years now and she is quite the little pro! So grateful! She knows exactly where to add the ooooh's and the aaaahh's!
To make resolutions or not, that is the question. I am a resolution-maker. I love them! I love writing them down and checking them off as I accomplish them. Yes, I make some that can never be finished and some that give me pleasure to say 'done' and add the little check.
This next year, I really, really want to step in closer to the Lord - to experience His fullness.
I want to again learn more about practicing Sabbath.
I want to scrapbook.
I want to cross-stitch.
I want to decorate for Christmas over Thanksgiving.
I want to try to mail one of the first Christmas letters people receive instead of my traditional New Year's letter.
I want to unleash my soul - to allow myself to love freely and in richer abundance.
I want to love my people well!
I want to know Jesus better!
I want to pray with Rick more.
I want to have more parties!!!
I want to hear more stories!!!
I want to really see the hurting.
I want to follow the Spirit's prompting to do random acts of kindness.
I want to do nothing to cause me shame.

May you be richly blessed in 2007 as you serve Him and His! May the Lord take great delight in you! And may you live in the sunshine of His face! Radiate on us, Lord! May we line up under your Light!

Merry Christmas

2006-12-24T14:11:00.000-08:00

Today is Christmas Eve. Growing up it was the day we opened all our gifts, ate special foods, and anticipated hearing the reindeer paws on our roof before morning.
Now, at almost 50, I love remembering Christmas long ago, but I have found none sweeter than the one I am living right now.
I have learned that Christmas it is so much more about Jesus! Today, Rick's class was encouraging us to ponder about what life would be like without Him - if He had never been born. YUK! I can't! I don't want to think about it! But -- if I don't, I miss the blessing and the joy of His life - He did come - He changed the world forever! The lives of women, of children, of poor, of the sick, of the heavy-hearted, of the wounded, of the empty -- would never be the same!
Jesus has made a difference - and continues to change hearts as we allow Him to invade us, to transform us, and to radiate through us!
May we become totally obsessed with Him in '07!

Malaya story

2006-11-22T07:51:00.000-08:00

Malaya spent the night Sunday night. We had planned to go see Happy Feet Monday afternoon. I was so excited about having some buttered popcorn. We were running errands before leaving town and she said, "Grammy, you know what I really want to do? I want to go the Decatur library and get my own library card." Wow - movie versus reading! Well, for this six and a half year old, reading won! Yea, Malaya! What every former grade teacher loves to hear!

Happy Thanksgiving, my friends!

2006-11-22T07:26:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is one of my favorite days of the year! All our children are coming in today and spending a few days! YEA!
We will eat and eat and laugh and laugh and talk and talk and eat and eat! Eating in our family is a definite time of sweet sweet fellowship! I take great delight in cooking for 'my people'. There is very little that I do that is more therapeutic. Yesterday morning, in the kitchen, I chose to have some time with the Lord. My soul was thirsty and my body was longing for some time with Him.
Silence is rare for me - must be intentionally planned. It is the end of a fun, busy retreat season for me and I was needing some uninterupted time with Him.
Then, in the afternoon, I listened to tapes of Josh preaching. He is going through Luke too and he is an amazing teacher of the Word.
This year, my dad is not feeling well but they are coming anyway! I am so excited to see the generations around me spend some time together.
May your Thanksgiving be filled with spiritual blessings!

Three more pictures!

2006-11-03T07:55:00.000-08:00

Rick was so surprised last Friday - we went to Houston - ok - I lied (along with the rest of my precious family) and told him I was doing a retreat for Josh's church. We stopped at Jonathan's to pick Josh up and - voila! All the kids were there! We wanted to celebrate Rick's 50th in a BIG way and - mission accomplished! Malaya wrote a tribute for Grampy (she is sharing it in the above pic) The guys all golfed on Friday; we all met in Galveston for dinner and Josh had reserved us hotel rooms on the beach! Malaya spent the night 'at our place' and Jed came over first thing Saturday morning (the pic on the left). The weekend concluded with a lunch at Tortuga's where a waiter made Jed a paper hat (the picture on the bottom left). We are blessed! Truth?????

Please note Rick's glow in all the pictures - yesterday and today - he had a great time!!! And we did too - lies and all! Ha!

Great Weekend!

2006-11-02T18:50:00.000-08:00

Here are a few pics from Rick's surprise weekend! We had a BLAST! We love our family! I have three more pics to post - stay tuned tomorrow!

Happy Birthday, David

2006-11-01T18:56:00.000-08:00

Eight years ago, I became a mother-in-law for the first time ever! David Shawn Bizaillion became part of our family - life for the Ross' has never been the same! We love him so much! Today we celebrate David's birth! He is 32. David is an amazing husband - my precious daughter trusts him; he is a joy to watch parent our delightful Malaya. David has been so patient with me as I continue to learn what it means to be a m-i-l. Thanks, David, for all the wisdom and kindness you bring to our family! We thank the Lord for you!

Catchin' up - again

2006-10-17T07:41:00.000-07:00

Two weeks ago today, I had my first fund-raiser for Wise County Christian Counseling. It went unbelievably well!!!! We raised $12, 571 that night with monthly commitments totalling
$26, 480 for the next year. I spoke last week for the Decatur Women's Club and they voted to let WCCC be one of three recipients for their proceeds from the Christmas Tour of Homes. This has been an amazing journey so far! God has been so amazing - more than I could ever ask or imagine!!!!

A few highlights from the night:
The centerpieces that Sandra Shabay made - beautiful!
Darla Cole's brave testimony - totally powerful!
Robert Isham's words of validation and support
Runnin' on Faith's performance
Jenny's presence even though she couldn't eat or drink a thing we had!
Colby Maddox's $1 contribution
Rick Ross' unending support and encouragement

I could go on and on..
It was a blessed night! The Lord was in the house!

Happy Birthday, Rick!

2006-10-10T11:45:00.000-07:00

And not just any birthday - happy, happy 50th! I love being in love with a 50-year-old! Especially as I have been blessed to a front row seat for the last 30+ years of watching him transform more and more into the image of Jesus. Sweet anticipation fills my heart as I contemplate the future with him.
Yesterday was his actual 50th. I had saved the date for a year - no retreats or plans at all, just being with him to celebrate. We did end up, however, having to reschedule a retreat we do together in Lovington, NM. We had a blast traveling together and hangin' out with friends.
Rick, I wish you many, many more blessed years!

Catchin' up...

2006-09-29T09:56:00.000-07:00

The last few weeks have been craziness for me. I am using this morning to catch up and writing this blog made the to-do list.
On September 15, my dad was careflighted to Tyler with all his systems shutting down - respitory and kidney failure, congestive heart failure, heart attack, the list could go on. It was a scary time as I drove to be with my mom. Josh and Kayci arrived shortly after I did (they will never know how wonderful it was to sit with me in that waiting room - but heart leaped when I saw Kayci's sweet smile and knew Josh was right behind her).
The second time Mom, Barbie, and I went in to see dad, he was very alert even though he had a breathing tube in - he couldn't talk but my dad has the gift of getting his message across with intense eyes and flamboyant gestures. He wanted to thank God and then he 'asked' my mother what had happened to him. Then he looked at me and pointed - he wanted me to pray! As we huddled over his bed, I voiced our praise to the Lord and our joy in the legacy of having a dad like Billie Jones, then he motioned to my sister - she, too, prayed over Daddy. What a blessing to have a dad so much in love with our Heavenly Father!
I am extremely grateful to be part of a nurturing community of faith. Jane Jones (Jeff's mom) beat me to hospital in Tyler with my favorite cookies in hand! We spend several nights with them in their lovely home! What wonderful new friends!
Dad went home for three days and is back in the hospital in Crockett with congestive heart failure but feels great and should go home early next week. Please pray!
We want to get them to Decatur asap!

**On Tuesday night, October 3, the Tommy Maddox Foundation is hosting a free dinner to introduce Wise County Christian Counseling - that's me! We have had a GREAT response so far. I pray the Lord will have His hands all over this ministry!

**I leave in a few hours to do a Ladies' Day tomorrow in Temple. I am so excited! Retreat season is here! Lots of travel in the weeks to come. I pray I will bring glory to His name and reflect Him in my words and interactions with my new friends.

Happy Birthday, Josh!

2006-09-12T21:33:00.000-07:00

Well, I have just a few more minutes to wish an extremely happy birthday to my oldest son - Joshua Louis Ross - better known as Josh, Joshy, or Boss - depending on who is calling him.
Today, Josh is 26. He was born in 1980, which still holds the record for the longest heat wave in Abilene, Texas.
I love to use birthdays to reflect on the treasures in my heart. With my firstborn son, there are many, many, many - so here are just a few:
*When he was little, he wanted to be exactly like his daddy -- wear a cap if Rick did, only wear zipper jeans because Rick did, sit like Rick, etc.
*He loved his Maw-Maw and Paw-Paw (my grandparents). They let him hammer real nails into a piece of wood. They let him work on all their doors. Paw-Paw chewed tobacco so Josh had a little spit can too! He still loves 'squirt cheese' and crackers - just like Maw-Maw always kept for him.
*Josh loved the Astros! That was a major bedtime issue for us! He learned his ABC's by their names.
*He loved football - could count by 6's and 7's before he could start to school.
*When he was in first grade, I got a call from his teacher - he had made an F on a spelling paper. When we questioned him, he said he felt so sorry for his friend that sat next to him who struggled in school! He didn't want him to feel alone! Compassion has always been in his heart!
*When we moved to Crockett, he was going into 2nd grade and Jonathan was going into Kinder. Jonathan had difficult time going to school. We thought maybe if Josh took him to class on the second day, he would do better. Josh had to peel his little brother's hand off his; so instead of having an unhappy Kinder son --- we now had a crying Kinder son and a crying 2nd grader. Toooooo sad!
*Beginning in about junior high, Josh turned into a major prankster! He got his teachers, principals, next-door neighbors, and even his father in on tricking me! Too many times to name here!
*He does a great Fresh Prince impersonation!
*His senior year, there was a tragic car wreck involving some fellow students. The student body was going assemble at night to draw strength from each other. Josh was called to speak and did an excellent job comforting his classmates with the Word of God.
*Josh has always had a heart for the lost. Several of his friends in Crockett and Mesquite were into the Lord Jesus.
*Watching him play football and lead his team, on and off the field, were a blessing to Rick and to me. (He and Jonathan still play flag football together - winning a game in Houston tonight.)
*He is a fabulous uncle to our precious Malaya - she adores him! (Can't wait to watch what he will do at night on our next vacation for Jed!)
*It is a blast to watch his tight bond with David, Jenny, Jonathan, and Jennifer!
*He brought Kayci into our family!
*Two years ago, when Rick and I began to catch on that things at Lake Cities were not going well, Josh rallied around us. He called us everyday. He cried with us and prayed over us. He spoke many, many words to refocus us.
*Today, Josh is known as a man of strength, tremendous wisdom, prayer, fasting, not only a gifted preacher, but a serving minister.
*Josh is a family man, planning time for us to all be together.
*He is not a middle child - he is our oldest son - a son that we are so proud to call our own.
**And he is going to be a daddy - a wonderful, wonderful daddy!

We love you, Josh, and are so proud of you! What a blessing you are to so many!

Grandbaby #3!!!!!

2006-09-06T19:11:00.000-07:00

Josh and Kayci are pregnant!!!! YEA!!!!! May 5 is our date!!!! Can't wait!!! Malaya wants a girl!!! Josh and Kayci, we love you and we pray for a healthy, healthy baby. We know precious cute is a for-sure!!!!
More to come - just wanted to shout it from the rooftop for now!!!!!!!!
Side note: 3rd blog of the week!!!!!

Malaya Story

2006-09-06T11:27:00.000-07:00

Sunday night, Malaya spent the night with me. After church, we ran by Wal-Mart for a "minute". After she had helped her Grampy at the self-checkout and we were walking back to the car, Malaya said something like: "Grammy, I just love that you live in Decatur now." (I totally agreed!!!) Then she said: "I love how you make new friends at church then come to Wal-Mart and get to visit with them!"
Want a social experience? Try coming to Wal-Mart in Decatur! There are no 'minute' trips though! But a total blast!

Favorite Things of Summer 2006

2006-09-01T21:03:00.000-07:00

September 1 - Summer is (to borrow the words of Malaya) "done, done, done, done, done, done, done!"
It has been a total blast! My first official summer in Decatur has been rich in God's blessings! His handiwork surrounds me! I don't want to forget them so I am making a list of the best:
(these are not in order of importance but in order of happening)
*planting a flower bed out the back door (with a fountain and a bird feeder)
*opening of Wise County Christian Counseling, a ministry of the Tommy Maddox Foundation
*Jedidiah David Ross was born!
*watching Bammel Road be such a supportive church family for Jonathan and Jennifer
*finding out the trip to Houston is really not that long!
*having Malaya over to spend the night and play
*going to Southern Hills for Jed's baby blessing, worshipping with Jonathan leading, staying with the Wares
*watching Jed smile
*Josh preaching on a Wed. night in Decatur
*Rick preaching on a Wed. night in Crockett
*going to hear Jeremy Camp and Stephen Curtis Chapman in concert at Six Flags
*speaking at ACU - traveling with and sharing a room with my friend, Vicki; seeing lots of old
friends and making new ones
*spending a very relaxing evening at Joe T. Garcia's with Jenny, David and Malaya
*staying with Josh and Kayci; hearing Josh preach; watching their new church love them
* taking Malaya to the circus
*getting Malaya's picture made at the McHale's
*going to Boston (and surrounding areas) with Rick
*celebrating our 30th anniversary
*watching Jed grow and learn to roll over and echo 'ooohhhhh'
*watching Jonathan and Jennifer parent so easily
*Malaya starting first grade
*watching my car roll over to 100,000+ miles
*nurturing our yard wth Rick - buying some of my favorite plants to add color
*reading Luke over and over again and learning more about Jesus every time!
*getting ready for Fall

Isn't that just like God? Never leaves His people without something to look forward to!! I just LOVE that about Him!!!!!

Happy Birthday, Jenny!

2006-08-03T20:51:00.000-07:00

On a Thursday, August 3, twenty-eight years ago, my identity changed forever! My heart has never been the same. I became a mother! I LOVE being a mother! I LOVE being Jenny's mother! She has been a joy and a blessing! I treasured her every move from the beginning. She had the sweetest, softest little cry but, boy, could it make us jump!
Some sweet memories:
1. She loved for us to read her books!
2. She loved her B and Papa!
3. She loved to wait up for her daddy when he worked late.
4. She was a fabulous snuggler.
5. She loved to work 100 piece puzzles.
6. She became a gifted reader.
7. She didn't enjoy her brother's baseball games but endured them anyway.
8. She collected Sweet Valley Twins, and later ... High.
9. She played Barbies constantly.
10. She nurtured her brothers sweetly.
11. She protected them fiercely (can you picture it???)
12. She was the 'queen' of a little league baseball team and looked beautiful on the float.
13. She tried to convince us there was a mouse under her bed - we didn't believe her - but later, when we moved - there was evidence little Jenny was right!
14. She dropped a ring down the sink - I became an immediate plumber to rescue it!
15. She played a great french horn.
16. She looked so cute marching at halftime - we were so proud!
17. She has always had a gifted singing voice - could melt her daddy's heart!
18. She fell in love with David Bizaillion - a blessing for us all!
19. She was a blast to plan a wedding with - I honestly don't remember one fuss! We had a ball!
20. She was a gorgeous bride!!!!!!
21. She has helped me move more times than is fair - thanks so much!!! You are the best packer! You know what I need before I do!
22. She is my favorite shopping buddy!
24. She has been a great - gifted - nurturing mother to our precious Malaya.
25. She was a great MOPS leader!
26. She is a teacher's dream for a room mom!
27. She is so beautiful singing on stage with KidStand!
28. She is a blessing to so many people! A blessing from the Lord to share His Light and Love!
Thanks, Jenny, for allowing Him to use you and draw others closer to Himself through your example of love and faithfulness.
I love you, my firstborn!

Going to ACU

2006-07-28T07:42:00.000-07:00

I am leaving later today to head west. I am speaking for the Summer Workshop at ACU tomorrow morning. Topic: the Light of the Lord. I LOVE studying God's Light! I love that we, His people, have been given such a distinguising mark - a mark to spotlight His glory. The second session, we will be exploring 'masks' tht we wear that hide His Light in us. Masks like anger, bitterness, fear. Can't those ugly masks creep in and on our hearts so very quickly. Oh, Lord, may we see the work of Satan - the work that diminshes You. May we make the choice to step into You, closer and closer. May we choose, Father, not to allow our own pain to hide Your hand in our lives! Lord, may my presentation be clear and be words that will honor Your Name.
Vicki Straughan, a dear friend and former co-worker, is also speaking at the workshop and we will be traveling together. I pray for sweet conversation.
Anne Jones, a precious young mommy from Southern Hills, is going to sing a couple of songs in the sessions. I can't wait to work with her! I will pray her new minsitry.
Please pray for safe travel and for the Lord to be glorified through our time together.

Pictures of my cuties!!!!

2006-07-14T06:52:00.000-07:00

Could life get better than this???? (I am so excited I have accomplished posting pictures! I may get better at blogging if I can show off my people!)
The first picture is of my delightful grandchildren having their first heart to heart. Malaya adores Jed and loves just staring at him! Looks like Jed enjoys her too! He is just over 2 weeks in this shot.
The second picture was taken last Sunday morning right before church. He is one month and three days. I had just dressed him for his introduction at Southern Hills. I love those dancing eyes and that HUGE smile!

Good Friends!

2006-07-11T12:17:00.000-07:00

I have been surrounded as of late with the reminders of the precious gift of wonderful friends! On Sunday, July 2, Johnny and Debbie Garner (along with Jonathan and Jillian) came to Decatur to see us! What treasured memories we share with them from our Crockett days. Rick's first ministry was in Crockett, Texas, and the Garners were gifted encouragers to us. I loved laughing with them and getting the latest on people we love. Friendship with history - fun!
Then on Monday, we had invited several couples from church over to eat Rick delicious burgers and drink iced tea! We ate on our back porch and relaxed to the purr of our fountain. Friendship with future - exciting!
Our little grand-daughter was with us for both! What a ball for us to enjoy her with our friends! and to watch her make new buddies too!
Wednesday night we had Jonathan, Jennifer, and JED with us for church and to spend the night! It was a total blast showing off our new grandson to all our church friends! This is the first church we have ever been at that hasn't known our kids so we relish the moments to introduce the fam!! I slept with Jed that night - actually all I do is lay beside him and watch him sleep. I want to memorize him - I do not want to forget his squeaks and stretches.
Rick and I spent Thursday night with our small group of friends that meet weekly to study the Word and lift each other in prayer. The Lord is our Reason and our Focus.
Friday I spent watching my very bestest friend play good golf! I love hanging out with Rick!!!
I spent Saturday and Sunday in Abilene with Phil and Donna Ware (and Jon, Jen, and Jed). What precious new friends! So hospitable! So warm! I loved worhipping the Lord at Southern Hills. Phil spoke sweet words of blessing over Jed. He reminded us of his legacy of faith.
May we be committed to revealing You, Father, to the next generation!
Great community of faith! Old friends, new friends, family friends, faithful friends, partnering friends, mentoring friends! Thank you, Lord, for the gift of friendship!

Happy Birthday, Jonathan!

2006-06-25T13:36:00.000-07:00

I haven't written a blog since Jed was born! I cannot tell you how many times I have tried but I decided I would not write until I can figure out how to post pictures! It can't be that hard! People do it everyday! I have found the picture button; I can upload them; then, gone... I am lost after that - boohoo! So many, many precious pics for you to see that are lost in blogland somewhere! I have been to Houston twice since my last post. I have the cutest pictures!!!

This last weekend we went to celebrate Jed's daddy's birthday! Today is Jonathan's birthday. June 25, 1983 was the day our world forever changed with the appearance of a precious baby boy! So many memories as of late because Jed looks so much like him! They share the same gorgeous eyes, same long torso, same love of being held, especially while sleeping! (That 'job' is mine when I am in Houston!) Last Friday night, Jen and I had Jed on the bed talking to him and he just opened his mouth and waited - we all waited - with anticipation - he was ready to talk, I totally promise. All three of us knew he was ready to tell us something! We got it even if no sound came out yet. Yep, just like his daddy! Jonathan was an early talker! Jed will be too! I know it!!

Jonathan, it has been a joy and a blessing to be your mother! Let me just ramble with a few memories for a moment!
*you could climb before you could walk!
*you tried to shave TWICE before you were four (what happened to that love of the razor?????)
*you were always so funny when you were in trouble that I found myself constantly saying "my
face may be laughing but my heart is not"
*you nearly got killed on the many dares from Josh (and probably Jenny - she was just quieter)
-the time you jumped off the porch of the Savage's garage apartment
-the time you drank Worcestershire sauce blistering you lips
*you survived them 'cannonballing' you to the ceiling when they were babysitting you
*you could sing all the books of the Bible when you were 3
*you and Clint performed at the Grace St. talent show when you were 5
*when I would wave at you at your football games, you would just shake your head 'no'
but I knew you loved it - didn't you????
*watching you lead a community of believers in worship through song
*watching you coach Jennifer through childbirth with such steadiness; watching her find
strength in you
*hearing you tell the nurse you were bringing Jen in to be 'checked' again even though the contractions hadn't been at 3 min apart for ONE HOUR - great call!!!!!
*watching you 'beam' at the birth of your own son
*watching you love you wife!!!! (to see her precious blog and pics, go to
www.jennifermaryross.blogspot.com)

I could go on and on and have a lot of fun doing it! I really just want you to know that you have been a gift since the day you were born! The best part has been watching you mature into a man of God! I love thinking of His eyes on you and His face smiling to see a heart given to Him! May He bless you richly this next year and forever! I love you!

Jedidiah David Ross is here!!!!!

2006-06-10T17:19:00.000-07:00

We pulled into Houston about 10 on Monday night - Jen had been sent home - the nurse said she was not quite ready. She showered a couple of times and timed contractions - serious contractions. Lyn (her mom) and I fretted silently downstairs - we wanted her at the hospital! Finally, about 12:45, Jonathan called the nurse on the phone to ask about when to bring her back. The nurse said when her contractions had been at 3 minutes for an hour! He asked if her could bring her anyway to double check. We all piled in cars - only to have Jen jump out in driveway - she couldn't sit down! Jonathan coached her through a couple of contractions and she climbed in the front seat. We followed in our car. We were delighted there was no traffic at 1 am and that Jonathan found the accelerator!
We got to the hospital at 1:18 and Jed was born in the triage room (an examination room) at 1:24!!!! Six minutes! Two nurses delivered him - or rather, watched him deliver himself! Jonathan said two pushes was all it took and it looked like Jed was on a slip and slide. Dr. Moore arrived shortly.
He is beautiful!!! I can't figure out how to post pictures yet but I have PLENTY! Laura, Jen's twin, went to get them delevoped for me and they gave her a box - almost $100 worth of pictures! and not one I don't want to post! He is a doll! Sleeps great! Eats great! and sneezes perfectly!!!
Jonathan and Jen had 20 people over to watch the Mavs Thursday night! (They came home on Wed. night) Clappers and all! Jed didn't even flinch! He must be well accustomed to his daddy cheering! His mommy and daddy decked him out in Mavs clothes to watch the game. Stay tuned for family shot! Jonthan calls him Dirk - my dad calls him Lightening! (because of his quick entry!)
Malaya held him 3 times yesterday and giggled the whole time!
We are grandparents of two precious, precious little ones! We are blessed!
Welcome to our family, Jedidiah!

It is time!

2006-06-05T14:09:00.000-07:00

Got the call at lunch today! I was with my precious friend Suzy when Jonathan called to say Jen is having contractions! The whirlwind began! Suzy ran to Target and WalMart for me (Jonathan wants to bring Jed home in Mavs 'stuff'.) I ran to my office to cancel appointments. This is it! They are at the hospital. We are on our way to Houston! Please pray for a safe delivery. More later---

Smelling a little change!!!

2006-05-24T13:44:00.000-07:00

Well, this is it! Change is upon us! All wonderful - all exciting!

1. This morning, Malaya 'graduated' from Kindergarten! How precious she looked! Her hair was almost as bouncy as her sweet little personality! This former first grade teacher pronounces her fully ready for first grade (or maybe fourth - ha!). David and Jenny are super parents! We even got front row seats to the graduation because of Jenny's hard work for Ms. Rhodes!

2. Wednesday is my last day with ChristianWorks for Children (formerly Christian Services of the Southwest). It has been a great place to grow, to learn, and to spread my wings as a counselor. I have made life-long friends with some of my colleagues. I will be forever grateful to Beth Darrow and Cullen Johnson for hiring me!
Now, I am on a path to get to Wise County permanently! As of June 1, I will be employed with the Tommy Maddox Foundation. I will be in Grapevine two days a week and in Decatur two days a week until August 1 - then... Decatur full-time! We are opening Wise County Christian Counseling, a Ministry of the Tommy Maddox Foundation. God has His sweet fingerprints all over this one and it has been a joy to watch it unfold!

3. Josh and Kayci are on their way home from a blessed and much needed vacation. They will be setting up house in Houston. Kayci will still be employed by ACU and is scheduled to begin June 5; Josh preaches his first 'employed' sermon at Southwest Central on June 11.

4. Jed is coming ANYDAY!!! Jonathan and Jen went for a dr. visit this morning and he gave her a copy of her file - just in case. (Jonathan thinks he is going to Game 5 of the Mavs series with the Suns. Jed may begin to show his control with a grand entrance in his own precious sweet time to mess that one up! - only if he is anything like is daddy - ha!)

I told you change is everywhere! May be the Lord be praised and glorified through it all!

O Dear Christian College We Love You...

2006-05-18T20:45:00.000-07:00

Ten years ago this August, Rick and I drove our precious first-born to Abilene to begin her ACU days. We have loved going to Abilene for visits - seeing old friends and making lots of new ones.
Last Saturday, both our sons graduated from ACU to end their college days. We are done!!!!! Josh graduated with his Master's of Divinity! and Jonathan graduated with his Bachelor's!!! We are so excited as they both enter new phases of their lives!
FYI: Jonathan received a Servant-Leader Award! Way to go! (All three boys got awards when they graduated! How cool is that!?!?!?!?!)
I started to feel sad that our trips to Abilene had come to an end but then my sweet husband reminded we are committed to being there in July and in September! YEA! We aren't totally done! I LOVE ACU! - always the party!

'Good' Friday

2006-04-14T06:47:00.000-07:00

Several years ago, through the encouragement of one of my children, I began to pay attention to what is called 'Holy Week'. I grew up thinking that Easter was about the bunny and eggs and a new dress and, finally, the day I could begin to wear white (until after Labor Day, of course). These are the traditions I passed on to my children - but through them I have learned that Resurrection Day is so much more. You see, this IS Passover week. This is the week that, so many years ago, Jesus went to the cross as our one and only Perfect Sacrificial Lamb. This is the day - oh, my, why do we call it 'Good'????? It is heartbreaking story to read through in the Word. To see Jesus tortured, to hear the screams and moans, to see the loneliness and despair in the eyes of the ones who loved Him. Mary...doesn't your heart just bleed for her?? To witness her God-child... I wonder if she remembered Simeon's words as he prophesied over her first-born: "This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel...And a sword will pierce your own soul too."
This is the day that Jesus, for the first time ever and the only time ever!, spent time isolated from God! - He was ALONE on that cross - alone with all our sin!!! I hate that picture. I hate it because I picture Satan laughing! What a grotesque scene!
This is a heavy scene - a heavy day! But Sunday, sweet Sunday is coming! The silence of death is broken through the empty tomb!
This year, with my granddaughter, we will still do eggs and the bunny and a new dress and white shoes -- but we will also relish in the thought of our freedom, of our salvation because God chose, on a Friday long ago to conquer sin - once and for all - through His Perfect Sacrificial Lamb, His Son, Jesus!

Happy Birthday, Precious Malaya!

2006-04-10T19:29:00.000-07:00

Six years ago today - I became known as Grammy - not just anybody's Grammy but Malaya's Grammy! This has been the most fun ever!
Malaya and I have had a special bond from the moment she was born! We find delight in the same things, laugh at the same things, watch the same kinds of movies, enjoy talking about the same things, and play the same kind of games! I love for her to spend the night with me and we just get to 'hang out' together.
Malaya, you are my special friend! I am so blessed to have you in my world! I love to hear you talk about God and Jesus. I treasure the times that you tell stories your mommy and daddy have read to you from God's Word. You made my heart leap for joy when you shared your favorite verse with me: Proverbs 17:17 -- "A friend loves at all times."
Malaya, I admire your decisiveness. May the Lord use and bless that skill as you take a firm, sure stand for Him! May your lips always profess Him as Lord!
Malaya, thank you for the joy I find with you!
David and Jenny, thank you both for sharing her with us!!!! We are blessed because you do!

Every muscle in my body is screaming!

2006-03-11T19:51:00.000-08:00

Today we worked in the yard! Oh, it is lookin' good! I planted lots of color we bought at Lowe's yesterday, lots of bulbs from a dear older 'sister' who has already home with the Lord, and one lone plant I have saved and moved to several different houses of my precious Maw-Maw's (who is also already in heaven making signs for me to welcome me in!) That was my favorite planting of the day. I hope it makes it! It is rare 'tamed' violet that makes beautiful ground cover. I have never seen it except in her yard until yesterday - there were some at Lowe's. I couldn't resist buying several. But my favorite is still that 'one'. As I planted it, I looked up at Rick and quoted my 'Grammy' verse: (Psalm 78) 'We will tell the next generation...' We both laughed and smiled at the tenderness of that moment. He knows.

We leave all our plants to grow in our absence. Tomorrow, we are heading to New Mexico. Our kids will come Monday and I can't wait! We have never done the mountains before - I am beach-kind-of-girl. But I am so excited about hiking in the mountains! - with my precious, precious family!!!!!! YEA!!!!

Psalm 71

2006-03-07T09:29:00.000-08:00

Today is my birthday and want to share a passage that I claim as mine for the next year and maybe beyond. Psalm 71 speaks my heart -- I will type through my tears - sometimes authenticity makes me cry. Just the unveiling of my heart, I guess. (I am choosing to leave out a few verses here and there.)

In You, O Lord, I have taken refuge; let me never be put to shame. Rescue me and deliver me in Your righteousness; turn Your ear to me and save me. Be my rock and my fortress. Deliver me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked, from the grasp of the evil and cruel men.

For You have been my hope, O Sovereign Lord, my confidence since my youth. From birth I have relied on You; You brought me forth from my mother's womb.
I will ever praise You.
I have become like a portent to many, but You my strong refuge.
My mouth is filled with Your praise, declaring Your splendor all day long.

Do not cast me away when I am old; do not forsake me when my strength is gone. Be not far from me, O God; come quickly, O my God, to help me.

...as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise You more and more. My mouth will tell of Your righteousness, of Your salvation all day long, though I know not its measure.
I will come and proclaim Your mighty acts, O Sovereign Lord; I will proclaim Your righteousness, Yours alone.

Since my youth, O God, You have taught me, and to this day I declare Your marvelous deeds. Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, O God, till I declare Your power to the next generation, Your might to all who are to come.

Your righteousness reaches to the skies, O God, You who have done great things. Who, O God, is like You?

I will praise You with the harp for Your faithfulness, O my God;
Iwill sing praise to You with lyre, O Holy One of Israel.
My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to You --
I, whom You have redeemed.
My tongue will tell of Your righteous acts all day long.

Now aren't those some words to use to celebrate a 49th year of life!

"Blessed"

2006-03-06T08:41:00.000-08:00

This may feel kinda wierd to read because this is going to sound more like a diary than a blog. I have so much that I never want to forget about the last two weeks. (Keep it short, Bevie, keep it short!)
It was such a treasure in this mother's heart to be in Abilene with Jonathan as he finished up at Southern Hills. I love worshipping the Lord with my kids!!!! He is an amazing leader! Wed. night at his final HIP (High Imact Praise time), the praise team sang 2 songs he had written. INCREDIBLE!
Jennifer is looking so cute! Jedidiah is a much anticipated little baby! We saw the sonogram - we could actually see him wriggling as much as his daddy did! I can already tell he is a little doll!

It was also a treasure in my heart to get to spend time with Josh and Kayci. Rick and I stayed with them and were so appreciative of their sweet hospitality! Rick had to leave on Tuesday but I got to stay until Friday. I loved our late night chats and snacks! I LOVED walking across campus with Josh and watching an elder from Southwest Central in Houston tell Josh over and over how much they wanted him to come there to work with them! I LOVED Kayci asking every night what my favorite part of the day was!

Another treasure in my heart was coming home to lots of sweet, sweet notes that our Wed. night ladies' class wrote to me. The Lord and I shared a special time of reflection and precious sweetness as He reminded me that I am loved by Him and them!

I had another treasure when I picked up Malaya and we went out to eat and to see Curious George. She is such a wonderful buddy! She spent the night with me and we enjoyed lots of giggles!

Jonathan started at Bammel Road a week ago! Yesterday was his first Sunday. Cool: He got to pick up Mark Schultz at the airport Saturday.
Josh and Kayci made the decision to join the Southwest Central Church of Christ in ministry in June. Josh will be the pulpit minister for them! I'm so glad I got to meet some sweet folks from there.
Jenny has made a decision that I will be able to talk about tomorrow. I'm so proud of her! She is an extremely gifted young woman. I constantly learn from her! She and David are the best parents ever!!!!

I feel like I have put gift bows on the tops of these young heads and presented them to three churches with their mother's prayer of blessing. Serve the Lord's kingdom well, precious ones! He has gifted you each in abundance for His glory! I am blessed to have a front row seat to your lives! Your mother loves you and ... well, I do not have the verbal skills to tell you how proud I am! I love the Lord and I praise Him for putting His fingerprints all over you! Wear them well!

Last Thursday night, we went out to eat with our Bible study group. The girls gave me a precious gift. It is a necklace with a pendant that says 'Blessed'. I am soooooo blessed!

Blessings are coming!

2006-02-18T08:55:00.000-08:00

Do you ever just know it - that you are about to step into a few days of sitting amongst God's handiwork? A time that you just know that you are going to bear witness to events that will leave you in thanksgiving for a lifetime?
Today we leave for Abilene. We will be staying with Josh and Kayci which is always a joy and very relaxing. We will worship with Jonathan and Jennifer tomorrow which is always a joy and refreshing. Jonathan will lead worship tomorrow at Southern Hills and will be traveling on to begin his full-time ministry with the Bammel Road Church of Christ in Houston. What a blessing Phil Ware and others at Southern Hills have been for Jon and Jen! Rick and I are very grateful they have had such an amazing launch pad for ministry!
Then, Monday, the lectures begin! I have all my classes chosen and am so excited over the possibities for spiritual bread! I have spend days pouring over the choices!
Wednesday and Thursday I am attending a Forgiveness workshop offered by ACU's Marriage and Family Dept.! Should be awesome! (It is being conducted by Dr. Everett Worthington.)
Wednesday night I am going to go with Jonathan back to Southern Hills for a night of praise. They will be doing at least a couple of songs he wrote! This mother can't wait!
An added bonus is that I get to do almost all this with Rick! He is definitely my favorite travelling companion! He will have to leave Tuesday - boohoo!
So I gotta go pack -- Blessings are coming!
Oh, Malaya -- when I get home Friday morning, I plan to pick you up from school -- let's go see Curious George, ok???? I miss you!

Young Mothers' Study Group

2006-02-10T11:10:00.000-08:00

In 1998, 10 days after Jenny's wedding, I presented eight sessions at the Bible Teachers' Workshop at ACU. After one session a beautiful woman, Judy Beard, came up to meet me with her daughter, Kelly Jones. Judy was one of the shepherd's wives from Southside Church of Christ in Fort Worth. She was also one of the mentors for YMSG (Young Mothers' Study Group). They met once a month (mornings) in some of the older ladies' homes and had a speaker present a message centered on relationships, marriage, spiritual growth, and/or parenting. I presented my first lesson for them in the fall of '98 at Billie Goodrich's house. What a great group!
I continued going over once a year for 6 years until fall of '04 when they asked me to come once a month! My blessing - totally!!! And we switched it to night!
So many inter-weavings! Only God could have held the knitting needles on this intricate plan!

Scott and Tonia Beard (Judy's son and daughter-in-law) live in Trophy Club. Tonia joined a community Bible study at my house when we lived in Trophy Club. We became dear friends!
In Dec. '04, Kelly Jones (Judy's daughter) asked me to present a series of lessons at Decatur Church of Christ for a community project. I fell in love with the community. Jeff, Kelly, Corey, and Josh are now our special Wednesday-night-eat-out-friends! (Jeff was extremely instrumental in convincing Rick to give Decatur a 'look'.)
Donny and Marcy Edwards (Judy's youngest daughter and son-in-law) were on the search committee that invited Rick to submit his resume at Decatur. We love watching them parent their four boys!
And Wes and Judy Beard are some of the most special people in the world to me! I LOVE them both! Last weekend I did a retreat for Southside and drove an hour to and from the encampment Friday and an hour on Sat morning -- only to discover Sat afternoon that the encampment was only 35 minutes from my house! But all so I could spend the night and hang out with Judy Beard a little bit more! (We rarely have had a moment alone!) (Wes greeted us at the door at midnight and had a snack ready for us to munch so we could visit a bit more!)

And now... (drum roll, please), my son, Josh, with his precious wife, Kayci, will be in town this weekend to try out for the preaching job at Southside! Could it be????

YMSG is one of my most favorite nights of the whole month! I am blessed to be part of this little group of women who loves the Lord intimately and each other intensely!
Thank you Chris Sawyer for starting this group years ago! Thank you Judy, Pat, and Emily for continuing on! I love you more than I have the verbal skills to tell you!

More blogs coming on this wonderful group of sisters!

It's a boy!

2006-02-01T20:06:00.000-08:00

Jonathan and Jennifer had a sonogram today and results were clear - we are having a BOY! YEA! Jennifer is due June 8 and we are counting down the days. When I was on the phone today with my dad, he was just cackling about his grandchild being a father. Dad said that it seems absolutely like yesterday that Jonathan was running around playing with his toy guns - now he is getting ready to be a 'papa'. (My dad's dad was known as Papa - that has always been our special family name for fathers.)
Jonathan and Jennifer will be excellent parents! I am so proud of both of them and their love for the Lord!
I can't wait to share life with this little one. I can't to hold him - to rock him - to laugh with him - to hear his sweet little giggle. I can't wait to hear him claim Jesus as Lord. I can't wait to...
This grandparenting thing is way too much fun!
Oh - Jedidiah is the chosen name - 'loved by the Lord' - I LOVE that name.
I need to go shopping!!!!!

Ms. Metzger finds the Lord!

2006-01-27T09:00:00.000-08:00

I had something on my mind earlier this morning to blog about today - it has totally evaporated! So, in my dedication to blog more frequently (ha!), I am going to share some random thoughts that I don't want to forget.
--
Tonight, Rick is taking Malaya on a date! They are going out to eat and then to Blockbuster to choose a movie. How cool is that! He is so excited! She is a great date for a Friday night of fun!
--
I am doing a retreat tonight and tomorrow for Southside in Fort Worth. I pray the Lord will just be HUGE as we focus on God's Story Through the Lives of His Daughters. Tonight we will be glimpsing into the lives of the 5 women in the geneology of Jesus (and in the Word that is all we have - a small glimpse into each - no details - boohoo): Tamar, Rahab, Ruth, Bathsheba, and Mary. Isn't it just the coolest thing ever -- that God carries His story on through us!
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I am on my way to Wal-Mart to get Flat Stanley's pictures developed. Do you know the story - the little boy that gets smashed when the bulletin board falls on him. He loves to travel! He went with me last weekend to Salado to a ladies' retreat. We had a blast! He had his picture made with John Wayne's saddle. Will Malaya's kindergarten class know who John Wayne is????
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Dad is scheduled to come home today! I know Mom is exhausted - spending 17 days in Tyler. Louis and Jane Jones (Jeff's parents) have been so wonderful to my parents. I love the fellowship of believers!
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Drum roll, please! The best news ever! Most of you know I went to Germany in November for a mission trip. Messages circulated this last week: The manager of hotel came to the States to find out more about Jesus. She said her life has been forever changed because of the family love she witnessed. She was baptized last night into the Lord Jesus! YEA!!!!! How coool is that?!?!?!!?
Thank You, Father, for allowing us to cross paths with her at just the right time!!!! You are amazing like that! Thanks, Lord, for the story you will tell through her! - Your awesome story!

I am a blessed child!

2006-01-20T19:09:00.000-08:00

Thank you so much for your sweet prayers, notes, calls, etc. following my Dad's surgery. He did great for the two days immediately following his surgery then the pain meds did a number on him and the oxygen level of his blood went way down. He has spent a week recovering from that trauma. Today has been his first good day. YEA!
I do feel so blessed to have a dad like mine. There is a proverb that I want to dedicate to him. Proverbs 20: 7 reads "The righteous man leads a blameless life; blessed are his children after him."
One of my most treasured memories growing up is listening to my parents whisper their prayers after the lights were out. Our only cooling was an attic fan so we all slept with our doors open. Late into the night I could hear my mom and my dad whisper my name to the Lord. I never want to forget that precious sound!
I am traveling tomorrow morning to Salado to do a retreat with the Crestview Church of Christ from Waco. I am so delighted! I was with them a few years ago and loved it! The topic is "Light the Fire" and it has been a total blast to write! Can't wait to present!

Dad's Surgery

2006-01-10T17:28:00.000-08:00

One of my new year's goals has been to blog more! It still is my goal even though I have been so crummy at it so far. BooHoo!
My dad is having major back surgery tomorrow morning. My sister and I will be with him and my mom tomorrow - I will stay for a few days.
Please pray for the doctor's hands and for Dad's recovery. Please pray for my mom - this has been so stressful for her.
Thank you, sweet friends!

Happy New Year!!!

2006-01-02T10:22:00.000-08:00

What a major blessing the last two weeks have been! I never want to forget them! Sounds of laughter everywhere; great food; sweet talks; tea parties; warm hugs; warm weather (I love it!); Mexican food in San Antonio! Oh, my! This list could get really long! Blessings! Blessings! Everywhere!
We spent from Wednesday - Friday in San Antonio with Josh and Kayci. They went for the Alamo Bowl game - the Cornhuskers won! Yea! We had a blast! Even traveling on 35 South - looking for other Big Red fans was an experience! (I wish so much we had a sign to share with other Christians like that. I wish we had a rush of excitement when we found fellow-travelers to heaven.) Thanks, J and K, for inviting us! I LOVED seeing the riverwalk during the Christmas holiday! I LOVED where we stayed and having time to spend with the Lord and writing my goals for '06. I want to be more intentional than ever in this new year.
I want to continue my study of Luke - I want to KNOW Jesus! I want to love people the way He would. I want to see people through His eyes. I want to introduce people to Him. I want to share in His compassion. I want to speak words - enthusiastic words - of hope, joy, and mercy.

And a great time was had by all!

2005-12-27T07:35:00.000-08:00

I love reading small town newspapers! The articles always seem to end with the line contained in this title - I just LOVE it when 'a great time was had by all' - and that describes our family's Christmas of '05! This was our year to be together on December 24-25 to celebrate! Great delight! My parents were here and all the kids! My sister and her family came over for Sunday! We all worshipped together Sunday morning - except poor Jenny who got really sick the night before - boohoo!
This time of year always brings on times of reflection -- so I want to share one of my 'ah-ha' moments with you.
When it finally struck me Christmas was on a Sunday, I moaned out loud. What a crimp it would be to have to rearrange the opening of gifts and the 'big meal' to go to church. (When your husband is the preacher, I felt it would be totally inappropriatae to .. well, you know, just not show up!) I was excited when the announcement was made that we weren't having class. But then the reflection began - is there any place I would rather be to celebrate the Lord's birth than with my family.
This last year has stirred in me a much deeper appreciation for God's idea of 'church family'. You know I have always loved it but now I really, really take delight in it. I am so grateful! So ... it was a perfect year for Christmas to be on a Sunday! So with my physical family surrounding me, I also spent a little time hugging on and laughing with my church family.
I wish Christmas always came on Sunday! The highlight: spending time worshipping the One I love with the people I hold DEAR!
Thank You, Father, for the joy of Your Son. Thank You for binding me with together with others who adore You and claim You as Lord! Thank You for the gift of Sunday; the gift of communion with You and a family; the gift of Your perfect Son - our Lamb, Whose blood links us as blood relatives! Thank You, Father, for my family!

A Christmas Tag for fun and A Christmas Thought for Real!

2005-12-21T06:37:00.000-08:00

Here is a Christmas Tag game my daughter had on her blog and I thought it would be fun to add to mine!
1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Hot Chocolate
2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Rick wraps each gift more meticulously than you can even imagine but the gifts Santa leaves hie gifts unwrapped.That's the way we know which gifts he brings on his sleigh and which ones are from us!
3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? Absolutely WHITE which my son-in-law puts up beautifully! (He does the colored ones too but just wanted to give hime a little advertisement for a little business he helps Rusty with during the holidays!)
4. Do you hang mistletoe? No, but I think I will for next year - with a timer!
5. When do you put your decorations up? As soon as possible after Thanksgiving!
6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)? Any thing Mexican - oh yeah, that is my favorite all year too!
7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child? waking up to see what Santa brought!
8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? We never discussed it! I have no idea when or how! I was afraid if I admitted anything he would stop coming!
9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? As a child, we always opened everything on Christmas Eve and then Santa came Christmas morning but...that's not how Rick's family did it. So, of course, being the ever-submissive wife that I am, we switched and I love the switch! But...this year, we are switching back to eve just because Christmas is on Sunday!
10. What kind of cookies does Santa get set out for him? Usually sugar but we always leave candies too.
11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? LOVE IT
12. Can you ice skate? I tried it once but my friends had to come get me (instead of just skate around me laughing, when the 'big machine' was wanting to clean and smooth the ice - the 'big machine' got tired of waiting on me to move out of the way.
13. Do you remember your favorite gift? Christmas is full of favorites!
14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Being with my family and taking great delight that we all love the One that we celebrate!
15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? Fudges, candies, etc.
16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? Gettting all the lists together; shopping with Jenny and Rick; going to James Avery; buying ornaments; cooking candies
17. What tops your tree? a star
18. Which do you prefer Giving or Receiving? for sure giving
19. What is your favorite Christmas Carol? O Holy Night; MWS's Gloria; Mary Did You Know
20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum? They are ok.

Feel free to join the fun! All you do is Copy and Paste; then change the answers!

Just a thought for real! Yesterday, we met Rick's brother in Waco (he's from Florida and we haven't seen him in forever!) We had a great time! At the table next to us was an older group - as one of the men was leaving, he turned to Malaya and said, "Merry Christmas, honey, none of this 'Happy Holiday' stuff for me!" I said, "Merry Christmas to you too! We believe in Jesus too!"

I have to tell you - I am not one bit sad about the rest of the world changing up their terminology about December 25. I am great with Target or whoever else saying "happy holidays". Whether they say 'Merry Christmas' or not does not mean they love Him or that they choose to serve Him. In my little opinion, Christians must stop fighting for what we want the world to say and concentrate our energy on radiating His Light! Radiating Him - to show that the love of the Lord is the only way out of darkness. A Christian's anger or sarcastic tone is not a light but a great big squelcher to getting out the news that Christ loves us! I'm afraid sometimes people run from Christ because they don't want to develop the spirit of some Christians! May we dedicate ourselves to radiating His love and show people how to really celebrate our risen Lord!

So Merry Christmas, sweet friends, and may these words be the distinguishing mark for believers!

Anna was baptized!

2005-12-14T20:08:00.000-08:00

In February, the Decatur Church of Christ invited me to speak at a community ladies' day as a fund raiser for WARM (Wise Area Relief Mission) - that was before they were considering Rick and before he was considering coming here. The WARM representative leading the day was a precious woman, Anna. We really hit it off - I was so impressed with her heart for the poor.
When Decatur called us to consider the preaching job, my fire was so lit to get to know Anna better. I told several people that I was attracted not only to the church family but also to the community.
When I started teaching the Wednesday night ladies' Bible class in September, Anna came! She and Jerry have been coming on Sundays and Wednesdays for a while. We have been so blessed by having them! She even came to our retreat! Two Sundays ago, I began teasing them - when the visitors were asked to stay seated, they stood! They invited us over, along with Jeff and Kelly Jones, to study with them Sunday night. They both have such a heart to know Jesus! Yeah, I didn't make a mistake with the wording - they invited us to study! They fed us royally and we discussed the Lord. Rick left several verses on baptism. Anna is a student! The Jones' went back over Monday night to answer more questions. Tuesday, Kelly called with the news! Anna woke up Tuesday morning wanting to be baptized into the Lord Jesus! Tuesday night, at the Isham's hot tub, Jeff Jones did the honors! ( We love our friends, Jeff and Kelly. What a blessing to share life with them!)
Anna, we love you! and cannot wait to witness how the Lord will use you and mold you in days to come! Welcome to our church family! Welcome to the journey!
I love this church! I love this community!

A Gift!

2005-12-07T09:01:00.000-08:00

I started out for work this morning after listening to the weather report but didn't get far into my trip. A few - a very few - miles out of town it started to sprinkle a little - not a big deal - turn on the old reliable wipers - but they were not working right. Aren't they made to take ice off too?!?!?! The 'rain' was freezing! A rare sight for this little Texas girl. I pulled over for a minute to let my defroster do its thing. But the second time it happened I decided to head for the warmth of my home. My heart began to race - I am soooo excited. I few phone calls with clients to cancel our appointments - then - let the fun begin! I can undo the last of the boxes today! I am cooking for the second time in my new house! Chili, of course. (Yes, I know I have lived here over a month - but...)
Today, I want to have some time catch up but I also want to spend some time with my 'honey'! When I walked in the door last Thursday night from a late night in the office - about 10 - Rick was sitting in his chair watching tv, looking very sad. I kissed him and went to get my supper - I realized he had eaten 1/2 of his supper, waiting for me to finish. He said, "You know, we bought this house so we could enjoy it together. Instead, I am enjoying it all alone."
I realized right then that I have been working way too many late nights. I have been way too busy! It hit me like a ton of bricks. I spend a lot of time in my life helping people understand how to nurture their marriage relationships. I refuse to neglect mine! This was such a wake up call for me!
I am grateful for the gift of today that I can spend time with Rick. I love you, honey, and want to be a very present wife! It really is the desire of my heart.! I love you!

A Mother's Heart

2005-12-02T06:38:00.001-08:00

I had a sign that once was taped on my fridge that read, "making the decision to have a child is like making the decision to forever have your heart go walking around outside your body." What do you think? There is something about that mother-child bond that I don't have the verbal skills to say any better than that!
Yesterday, my daughter wrote a blog that has touched many. When she was little and hurt, I had so many choices of ways to make her feel better. She loved to sing, she loved to cuddle, she loved a good snack, she loved to go visiting or have a friend over. But now she is a beautiful young woman - and it not a skinned knee anymore, it is a hurting heart! And I can't 'fix it'! and her dad and I are so frustrated that we can't take away our little girl's hurt!
Please check it out: www.kindermommy.blogspot.com.
Please join our family in praying! Jenny and David are raising our precious Malaya to love the Lord and we all anticipate the day she professes Him as her Lord! We would be delighted for more children to come into their home to join us in bringing praise to the One we serve!

Father God, Giver of all that is good! I have been praising Your name since my head was still on my pillow this morning. I love You and I am learning to trust You! Your history with our family has been rich! Please, Father, please bless Jenny and David with another baby. Please, God, fill her womb with life. We choose to continue to love You no matter what; we choose to worship You no matter what; we will continue to praise Your Name because You are worthy. We know that You are the One we need, that You hold the miracle. Please, Lord, touch us with it! Holy Spirit, thank You, that You will clean up this prayer and make my groanings understandable to the Lord! See me heart, Oh Father - hear the words of my heart!
In the blessed name of Jesus, Amen and amen.

Today is my spiritual birthday!

2005-11-26T17:26:00.000-08:00

November 26, 1967, at ten years old, I walked to the front of our church building, in LaMarque, Texas. Bob Johnson (known to me then as "Brother Bob") asked me if I was ready to make Jesus Christ the Lord of my life - I said 'yes'. Did you catch it? I was ten years old! But I could not and I still cannot imagine my life without Him! I was blessed to grow up in a home where both my parents knew the Lord and talked of an active relationship with Him.
The push to walk down the aisle however came when, between Bible class and worship that day, Bunny Bryce firmly told me she was going to 'go forward' that morning. Well, why not today!?!?! (get it, kind of like 'why not tonight?) I knew I loved Jesus; I knew I wanted to wear His name; I knew I wanted to be clean to God; and I knew that on my own, I was stinky. I knew enough to KNOW that I needed a Savior.
After 38 years of walking with Him, I know now that I had no clue how desperate for a Savior I was. I LOVE that God does His cleansing even when we have no clue. I LOVE that I don't have to understand His love, His grace, or His mercy. I LOVE that He simply has called me to rest in them. There is nothing that I have to 'get' except that He is God and that I am not. He gets it and I don't - but I get Him! (a quote from Mike Cope at Stream, 2005) I LOVE that everytime I come to an 'ah-ah' (a time when I learn something new) moment with Him, I don't have to climb back in the water to receive His forgiveness. I LOVE that He continually cleanses me - even though I don't understand Him! My salvation is all wrapped up inHis work - NONE of my own.
I feel so blessed to have been raised in a family that honors 'spiritual' birthdays. This morning, I woke up at my parents' house (we were still there for Thanksgiving). My parents both greeted me with a Happy Birthday. What a blessing! Not only do they honor the day my body breathed its first breath of life, but they honor the day my soul was gifted with the Breath of Heaven! Thank you, Mom and Dad! Thank you for teaching me so much about the real Gift of Life!

I come to the Lord with a heart FULL of thanksgiving!

2005-11-23T08:37:00.000-08:00

We are leaving a little after noon today to go to my Mom and Dad's house for the holiday. Malaya spent the night and she is going with us; Jenny and David are coming later.
I love this time of year! We did our first real Christmas shopping trip yesterday. The sales hadn't started yet but who has time to wait?!?!?!!?
As I reflect back on this last year, I am so grateful that the God I serve is moving, is constantly revealing His power and might -- and that He is faithful! That He lovingly blesses His children with His presence!
This has been a year full of His presence! I am thankful!
For my children - all six of them - being such reflections of the Lord's love to us.
For my little granddaughter, Malaya, and the rich joy she brings to my life! I love being her Grammy! and I can't wait to be a Grammy to our new forming little one! (Can't wait until June!)
For my new church family! What a blessing to be part of a church family where we feel so loved and affirmed by the leadership! And so many brand new friends!
For the ministry, Come before Winter, and all the new friends that have come as a result of our travel! I LOVED our team! and made so many new precious friends from Europe! Makes the anticipation for heaven swell!
For God's Word - I love the age-old treasures found in it!
For music to praise Him! I LOVE to sing to Him!
For my wonderful husband! I adore him! He truly completes me! The Lord constantly uses Rick to bless me!
I am grateful that God has called me His own and constantly works in me - that He chooses to use someone like me! He knows all my 'stuff' - and still calls me to shine for Him - using the Light of His love to do it! Amazing!

I'm home and now awake enough to write!

2005-11-16T15:11:00.000-08:00

Wow! Thanks so much to those of you who lifted our trip to the throne room of the Lord!!! He was His usual Faithful Self and covered this trip with blessing! He was HUGE for us and totally amazing! I don't know where to start!
This trip was a first for me is so many, many arenas. I have never travelled with a team of women that our only link was that we are all crazy about God. That was an especially rewarding experience. I'm not sure I have ever laughed more and cried more and felt more totally 'at home' in my whole life! I LOVE my new friends! God bound us up tight!
And the missionary women! Oh my! How beautiful are the feet of those that bring good news! These women put a whole new meaning on the word 'sacrifice'! They are amazing instruments on the altar of God! I really wanted to bring several home with me! I loved worshipping with them, praying over and with them, studying God's word with them, reading with them, and, of course, partying with them!
Germany is beautiful! So sharp in color! Lots and lots of flowers! Gorgeous! On the Saturday before we left to come home, we toured Martin Luther's home and the church where he hung his 95 theses. He was buried inside that church. We surrounded his grave and sang - in four part harmony - A Mighty Fortress is Our God. Talk about history coming alive! Sweet moment!
I am delighted to have gone and delighted to be home - home with my brand new Decatur sisters. God has been so sweet to me! (I think I have said that a lot recently.)
Thank you, Father, for the gift of friendship. On the other side of Your world, I now I have brand new friends that I will get to party with in heaven when we all speak the same language! I saw you, Father, in their eyes and in their tears! I can't wait to share moments in life with them again!
And in Decatur, I have brand new friends to share part of this journey! Help us, Father, to step in closer to You each time we hang out!
Oh, Father, what a blessed woman I am to have a family who professes You as the Holy One! Thank you for their faithfulness in prayer over my trip. I am glad to be home and back in my husband's arms! I missed his kisses!
I am blessed, Lord! Thank you for this new chapter opening with such a 'bang'! I love to be 'wowed' by You. Only You can do it this wonderfully! Thank You, Lord! Thank You!

Prayer Warriors Unite!

2005-11-03T18:45:00.000-08:00

Well, November 4 is almost here! I leave tomorrow afternoon for a mission trip with a group called Come before Winter. I am delighted to have this opportunity. I will be traveling with 13 'girlfriends' to Germany to facilitate a weeklong renewal for missionary women from several locations in Europe. We each have been asked to have our friends and family lift us up in prayer during the prep time and during the journey. I am reminding those who I have previously asked and soliciting more prayer covering beginning tomorrow. While this trip has been planned for more than a year and a half - I had no idea how it would all unfold. My prayer requests have been turned in long ago but I had no idea what a turn my life would take in the last month: I have sold a house, bought a house, had surgery, and moved - all since October 7! Craziness! (as my son Josh would say). But the Lord has so got my back - He has been soooo sweet to me! Oh, I could go on and on about how at home I have felt today - at home in my new house, with my friends, in my own skin! At home because I KNOW He is in my heart! Wowsie-powsie!
This could get really long - I'll journal tomorrow so I don't forget a thing - maybe a future blog --but for now, my prayer requests:
PLEASE PRAY--
*for Rick while I am gone.
*that my ministry will be a sweet and fragrant aroma to the Lord.
*that the flights to and from Germany will be free of anxiety -- and motion sickness!
*that the Spirit will fill me with wisdom and discernment in all my interactions with the women on my team and the missionaries who attend. I want to be a Proverbs 11:25 kind-of-girl!
*for my mom and dad (my dad is not doing very well - I pray he will not be in pain and that his health will improve asap)
*for my new church family! - Please join me in thanking the Lord for bringing us together!
*that the Lord will just be HUGE for us!
Thank you so much!
Can't wait to write more on November 14 - my first day home!
I love you, my friends!

Happy Birthday, David

2005-11-01T19:23:00.000-08:00

Today we celebrate! (We really did on Saturday because of the hustle and bustle of this week.) We are so thankful that David Shawn Bizaillion is part of 'us'! He is amazing! The list would be too long to blog if I attempted to list all the things my son-in-law does for us but -- even with all he does (did I already say it is a LOT) -- nothing compares with his sweet servant heart! David is a joy - he is full of rich wisdom! David, today we praise God for your life! Oh, yeah, I do that every day but today more than ever! Happy, happy 31st!
Thanks for being such a fabulous husband for our precious Jenny! Thanks for being such an awesome daddy to our angel, Malaya! Thanks for your quest to know the Lord better! Thanks for enjoying life! And thanks for sharing ours!

Almost done

2005-10-29T20:30:00.000-07:00

Well, we are coming to a close. We are surrounded by boxes. Not much left. David and Jenny came over and spent the day working, working, working. What a blessing! Oh, Malaya worked too! She, at five years old, did ALL my spices! (Isn't that amazing?!!??!) But Jenny and David - oh my! I am so humbled to have them in my life! There is something about the way Jenny and I work together that is really rare and so connecting! In times like this, my attention span gets really short - so overwhelmed - she sweetly redirects me, we laugh, we enjoy the moments, and we love closing the boxes.
And David, he is such a wonderful work partner for Rick! He is so willing!
We celebrated David's birthday tonight! What a perfect addition to our family! We are so proud of him!
Almost closed - the final box - the final chapter - in a very long story. Only long because it has been so painful. But the Lord is so good, so faithful! I just want to be on His side, with Him at my side - forever. His sweetness is immense and so deep. Usually closed chapters haunt me but I have learned that with closed chapters, it means a brand, spanking new one gets to open! Open it, Lord - I'm with you! I can't wait to see what You are going to do in the newest chapter of our lives! Have Your way, Father! Reign in my heart!